“The rest of our life”

It was a warm evening on the bus ride from a local Supermarket to our hdb flat when Bandi suddenly said, slowly and dreamily, “Do you realize it? We’re finally living the rest of our life…”

You probably don’t get it. At first I didn’t get it either. What did he mean by that?

“You see, I’ve been saying I wanted to marry you for so long, I’ve been striving to the day I could finally marry you and I’ve been wishing to spend the rest of my life with you… And now it’s happening… You’re already my wife. And we…”

“We are already spending our lives together. We’re already there.” He lifted up the grocery bag on his hand, smiling happily.

Was that contentment I saw in his eyes? I hope so.

Yes, it’s true that we’ve only been married for 3 months but we’ve lived together for the past 3 years. But somehow… I know that he needs security. He needs to title husband to feel content, to know that he is living the rest of his life now.

The phrase “The rest of my life” sounds very long, forever even. It is until the day you die. When we said “I want to spend the rest of my life with you”, we didn’t really realize that the “rest of the life” could actually come.

Now.

The rest of the life is now.

Now is already part of the rest of the life.

The rest of our life has already started.

It contains of sharing dreams, cooking meals, cleaning the house, traveling on new adventures, visiting family, working for personal growth, and a lot of grocery shoppings.

It didn’t start merely on the day we said “I do.” It wasn’t like in a movie where there’s a grand orchestra as the background on the first day of the rest of our life.

It was on a bus ride, with sweats on our shirts and grocery bags on our hand… when we finally realized “We are living the rest of our life.”

And he finished it with a happy smirk on his face while saying, “Oh my god, you are finally my wife.”

MayBand 002-RCheers,

May, the wife.

 

#30daysblogging Epiphany

Day 19

Post is an idea from Erry.

From someone as ngocol as Erry, it was kinda surprising when she gave me a serious topic to post about. She told me that she had a turning point in her life when her Mom passed away and not long after that she conceived Fathir. I don’t know if her turning point changed her life so much, and I don’t know if it was also called Epiphany, but I guess I will talk about my Epiphany now.

I don’t know what is turning point… so maybe I haven’t had any. I know something about Epiphany. Based on dictionary, Epiphany means a moment of sudden and great revelation or realization. So it’s like an eye opener, a moment that makes you realize something that has been clouded all of this time.

This happens last year on February. Bandi missed a flight back home to Singapore, so I had to flight home alone. I’ve already written the story here, so I will not repeat again, but I will tell you why this Epiphany changed my life.

Before that day, I was this girl who never wanted marriage. I did turn down Bandi’s first proposal attempt to marry me and I was so close to let him go (not because I didn’t love him, but because I wanted to set him free.)

I tried so hard to open my heart and love fearlessly, but somehow I just couldn’t. Bandi was frustrated with me. He felt that he already tried everything to assure me that his love is true and that we were made for each other but somehow… somehow… I just couldn’t open my heart. I could say that… I loved Bandi with insurance. I did love him, I wanted a privilege to be his girlfriend, but I still wanted a ticket to go out from the relationship whenever I wanted. I needed an insurance. So whenever I felt like leaving him, I could.

(I know I know, what a bitch, right?)

You guys would probably think I’m a bad person. I could accept that. I was.

But that night, I changed.

I had the epiphany. I was so close to let him go and with all the missing-the-flight things and all the signs from the universe (FYI I believe in signs) I really really thought that I had to let him go.

And then there he was… knocking the door at midnight. He came home. And he brought back all of his legal documents that I’d left at the airport and he also brought my luggage that was left at Soe-tha airport. He was like trying to assure me that he was a superhero. Everything he did was like saying there you go, universe. I made it. Nothing can make me stop coming home to her. Nothing.

It seems silly, I know. But it’s something that’s hard to explain. It’s something that’s really really personal actually and here I am sharing with you.

That moment might not instantly make me want to marry Bandi, but it was the moment I started to think about what I really want in my life.

And him was the only one appeared everything I thought about it. It was kinda scary because I have never put anyone in my life as my priority before and suddenly I realized I have invested so much feeling on somebody it was overwhelming and scary and new for me. And deciding to carry on was the best decision I’ve ever made in my entire life.

Dreams changed and he was my new dream. And I didn’t mind.

Cheers,

May, feeling content.

When this blog returns to its blabbering habit

Hey cherry pies! Happy new year!

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Today I woke up in the morning thinking to write one honest post in my blog. I guess it’s been a while since I blabber about my crappy awesome life, that’s weird because I love talking about my life! Lol

I think I’ve been so busy with post-europe stuffs, wedding prep, xmas and new year (both real new year and chinese new year) oh well, I’ve just been busy with life actually. I didn’t really have spare time to write anymore. I read some blog posts from my favorite blogger on my phone inside the mrt train and didn’t leave comments because writing comments in mobile phone sucks.

I hope after all the year-end fiesta ends, I could live my slacking life again. I kinda love it being a lazy ass. I did write some stuffs inside my drafts but I didn’t know why I didn’t publish it. I guess I want to have a clean posts in 2013 that don’t suck. 2013 was actually a good year for my blogging life. :)

But from today, I guess I will revert back this blog to be full of craps again. Lol. Just kidding, I will try to write some unedited honest post some time.

How’s your countdown and your first morning in 2014? Mine started exactly the same like last year… Cleaning up the house full of spilled alcohol, confetti and crashed m&m’s, not to forget to brush off toilet full of pukes. Eww… what a glamorous way to start a new year, right?

Talking about new year, people like to tell about their new year’s resolution. I think I’m one of those people who is goal-oriented so my resolutions were usually well done in the past years. My 2013 resolutions were to sit up everyday and I’ve done it until I went to Europe, so I’d been doing sit ups everyday for 10 months.

What about this year’s resolution? Well, I decided not to make one. I will stick to that “sit up everyday” thing but I won’t call it a resolution because I want to make it my permanent lifestyle. I really want to have a great abs again. And to complete that… I think I have to stop drinking. I hate the feeling of waking up remembering blurry night and having spinning morning. Ok, that’s crap. I won’t totally stop drinking, but I will drink less. I promise I won’t drink during weekdays anymore because it was so tiring to wake up early and work the next day. I also promise not to do any excessive drinking at least until my wedding, or my bachelorette party (if that’s happening-ahem, hint to the bridesmaids!) But well, promise is a big word….. Hmm… Ok now I’m being indecisive. But I do really want to drink less! Ok but maybe not a promise. :p

Anyway, I don’t want to leave an impression as if I’m a loser drunkrad. I’m not, ok? It’s just that last year I had a lot of drinks maybe because I was stressed out and tense. Hmm… That’s a lie, I wasn’t stressed out! I just like to drink! Lololol.

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I should start being serious, shouldn’t I?

Ok, enough talking nonsense, let’s talk about what has been going on in my life lately…

Well life’s been good. I made peace with my brother and that fact put a smile on my face everytime I remember it. I’ve been missing my friends so much but now that Strawberry is visiting, it cheers me up. :) I don’t have any travel plan for 2014, I guess Bandi and I are focusing the funds for the wedding. Oh boy wedding is costly! But again, that depends on who spends it. Some people spent 10 times more and they would probably think it was a cheap wedding. Well for me, I would want to spend my wedding funds for another Europe trip, but Bandi always reminded me that the money will be well spent because he promised that it’s going to be the night when we celebrate love. And that sounds pretty awesome.

I try not to write my wedding prep in my blog because the wedding is very very small and I don’t invite a lot of people (bcoz it’s small, duh!) so I don’t wanna be like those annoying kids who show off their new toy but wouldn’t share to play together. LOL.

I just want to say that everything goes according to plan, yeah of course there are some hiccups here and there but hey who doesn’t, right?

Thank you for the kind encouragements I’ve received, I didn’t know before that planning a wedding took times and energy so an encouragement did cheer me up. :)

Hmm, what else… Oh! 2014 will also be full of bandi’s friends’ wedding so I will need to travel back and forth to Indo a lot of times. That’s tiring but Bandi always say yes to invitation, he’s a people pleaser. So I guess I have to tag along.
For me, I usually don’t go to friend’s wedding unless they’re very close to me. It’s not that I’m rude or anything but I would want to come to a wedding where I know the love story of the people who weds, I’m a romantic! But in my inner circle, I’m the first who get married and that’s pretty annoying because I’m the one who always said “don’t get married too fast” but here I am, 27 years old and freaking engaged! (Just kidding bandi! You know I love you, right?)
Did I have the regret to be engaged young? Hmm, sometimes I do think about it… I think 28 years is too young to be married (my opinion) but then I always tell myself that I’m marrying a very wonderful man whom I’ve known so well and he wouldn’t abuse me or sell my kidneys once we got married. Lol.

I think that’s enough for the first blabber in 2014… I wouldn’t want to spill all the craps now. I will go to KL tomorrow with Strawberry and will be back to Spore on Sunday, so until then, be good! =D

But one thing for sure... 2014 will be the awesomest year ever because I can't wait to marry my bestfriend. =)

But one thing for sure… 2014 will be the awesomest year ever because I can’t wait to marry my bestfriend. =)

Cheers,

May, isn’t really sure if she’s sober.

Seventh

Yes, today Bandi and I are celebrating our seventh anniversary. Seven freaking amazing years. Each year I get fall deeper in love with him and looking forward for many years to come.

I decided to pick my seven favorite photos of us and show it off here. Trust me, it’s very VERY hard to just pick seven from thousand of photos of us. (Yeah, I’m horribly narcissistic and he followed somehow)

So here goes my magnificent seven, in random order.

1. Good time, bad time.

Photo was taken on Christmas 2007. I got the idea from some clip in youtube. Love how this photo turns out. =)

Photo was taken on Christmas 2007. I got the idea from some clip in youtube. Love how this photo turns out. =)

2. Something happened on the way to heaven.

Photo was taken by a dear friend around August 2007. We both didn't know that we were being photographs. We were going up to the campus. Bandi was dressed up because he was going to meet his lecturer about his thesis. I was going to go for a class of course. Really love these photos.

Photo was taken by a dear friend who had just borrowed an SLR, around August 2007. We both didn’t know that we were being photographs. We were going up to the campus. Bandi was dressed up because he was going to meet his lecturer about his thesis. I was going to go for a class of course. Really love these photos.

3. Hang on to you.

Photo was taken on June 2010 at Seminyak, Bali. I was supposed to sit on Bandi's shoudler but I was scared so I was struggling to go down but Bandi didn't let me. My friend who held the camera decided to freeze this moment. =)

Photo was taken on June 2010 at Seminyak, Bali. I was supposed to sit on Bandi’s shoudler but I was scared so I was struggling to go down but Bandi didn’t let me. My friend who held the camera decided to freeze this moment. =)

4. The Jump.

Taken on the same day with the previous photo. Bandi and I bungee jumped in double six, Bali. It was a scary yet exciting moment, but definitely a moment to remember. =)

Taken on the same day with the previous photo. Bandi and I bungee jumped in double six, Bali. It was a scary yet exciting moment, but definitely a moment to remember. =)

5. The beach, the skies and the kiss.

Another beach photo, which turned out to be dramatic. Taken on November 2012 at Boracay Island, Philippines. Even though the photo is heavily edited nothing is photoshopped. We used self-timer and didn't expect that it would be this good. =)

Another beach photo, which turned out to be dramatic. Taken on November 2012 at Boracay Island, Philippines. Even though the photo is heavily edited nothing is photoshopped. We used self-timer and didn’t expect that it would be this good. =)

6. The New Year Kiss.

Bandi and I have our tradition to always kiss on the new year's time. So when the countdown ended, he reached out to me and gave me a new year kiss for 2013. We didn't know that a friend captured this sweet moment. =)

Bandi and I have our tradition to always kiss on the new year’s time. So when the countdown ended, he reached out to me and gave me a new year kiss for 2013. We didn’t know that a friend captured this sweet moment. I love how dramatic it looks because there were no faces in this photo but I could feel the love in the air. =)

7. And I got yours.

Photo was taken just last month at Henderson's bridge, Singapore. It was a sunny day and a fun day. I love how Bandi and I accidentally wore contrast-colored outfits. =)

Photo was taken just last month at Henderson’s bridge, Singapore. It was a sunny day and a fun day. I love how Bandi and I accidentally wore contrast-colored outfits. =)

So, those are my favorite photos during our seven amazing years together. Oh how I wish I could put our 100 favorite photos because that would be easier for me to filter them out. LOL.

Since the this year’s anniversary falls on Friday, we’re gonna theme it anniversary weekend! We still don’t know what we’d do. Maybe we’ll go on a dinner date and buy 7 different cakes and 7 lottery tickets or we’d watch 7 different movies all day and probably eat 7 different type of foods. LOL.

Seven is his favorite number, that’s why We’re gonna make this special. =)

So, which one is your favorite photo? ;)

Cheers,

May, never thought to be in love this long… with the same guy.

My favorite photobox with him. =)

My favorite photobox with him. =)

UPDATE: all my plans are ruined because Bandi turned out to make plans better!!! Hahaha! He surprised me at four in the morning to pack some clothes and bring me to Changi airport!!! Hahahaha! I always wanted an impromptu trip from a guy I love and today it happened. He prepared 7 great things for us but for this, I’ll just say I’m very happy. Truly happy. Let me just keep all the details private for myself. :)
Oh god I really love him. :)
Bandung, 7th June 2013, May.

The Romantic

If you ask most of my friends, or even just an acquaintance from college, what is the one trait they know about me; the answer would be…

… That I am a romantic.

How did I, or anyone else knew me, call myself a romantic? Well, if you don’t read all of my posts before, let me give you some of the pointers:

I, once, stood on the rain for a guy just to make sure he was under my umbrella… in front of the whole school.

I, once, fell in love with a stranger and we had our own before sunrise moment.

I, once, created a perfect birthday party with 21 birthday present for a man I loved and he shed a tear.

I had written 20 letters to be open each one every year on the birth date of my high school best friend, until the year that we supposed to meet again.

I, once, wrote a book for a guy I fell in love with and gave it to him on his birthday.

I, once, bought a ticket overseas on the day and flew to meet my best friend.

I always ALWAYS did things because I felt things. I always followed my heart. I kept people’s details somewhere in my brain and never let them go. I could rewind a conversation with my friend that happened 10 years ago. I remember moments better than remember numbers.

I always feel that my love life is like a serial of romantic novel. A good one.

I’m the kind of person who has a lot of friends and manage to make them feel special. I love to make people feel special. I am a romantic.

However, I forget I was one though… when a friend reminded me.

So let’s roll back over to the time when I read this article. I found this article to make sense. And even though it is from an islamic website, I shared it on my facebook page. A friend commented like this below:

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Have I changed into a realist?

My comment surely made me look like I am a realist. That kind of person who believes that the mind is stronger than the heart? Is that true?

Have I lost my romanticism?

It is sadly true that lately I haven’t written any love poem, or done any impulsive date, or even read romantic novel. But I’m still the girl who would like to dance in the rain, the girl who gets the blush over a stalk of rose, the girl who would looove to marry in an impromptu moment, the girl who would wait forever for a true love.

I’m still that girl.

I’m just in a commitment now. As much as I wanted to say that my love life is as perfect as I wanted to be, it is not. Sometimes I did things I didn’t want to do just for the sake of relationship. I did compromise a lot, used my brain a lot, but not necessarily stop using my heart.

Or maybe I’m just getting old. People said age could suck the romanticism out of you. It’s probably right.

Or maybe it’s just a phase in my life. You know, one time when I was in teens, I attracted to girls. (But then Cristiano Ronaldo came. (LOL))

A good friend of mine once told me that Idealism is elastic. You may stretch it anyway you like, following your condition. But you will always go back to your core ideals. And that IT IS OKAY to stretch it.

I am still the hopeless romantic deep down inside, Yo… A touch of mean reality did nudge me a little but it won’t change the fact that I love hard. I do.

Thank you for reminding me, Yo… =)

 

Cheers,

May, who had just received a stalk of rose couple days ago.