Do you remember this post? Bandi and I received a sad news on the first day of new year. Bandi was diagnosed positive on Hepatitis C.
Looking for a good and reputable hospital to do a pre-marital check up, a friend recommended Eka Hospital. We paid a pretty fat cheque for our full check up, just to make sure we are not only a match made in heaven by the Universe, but also a match made in laboratory.
I did my blood test first, followed by Bandi a couple of days later. We were waiting to meet the obgyn when Bandi received a phone call, “Sir, can you please come back to the lab to give another blood sample?”
Bandi asked, “Why?”
“The result for HCV is reactive. Let’s do another test to confirm.”
“What is HCV?”
“It’s Hepatitis C.”
The result from obgyn then didn’t really matter to me anymore because my only goal in life is to live with Bandi til we’re 100 years old. The news obviously troubled my mind.
We then went to meet the GP to discuss about the lab result. The GP wasn’t very informative. “How could someone be infected by Hep C?” I asked the doctor.
“It’s transmitted by blood and sex.”
Bandi was too confused to talk so I kept challenging the doctor, “well, my hubby never had blood transfusion, doesn’t have tattoo and the only sexual partner is me. If he’s having it, I will be having whatever he’s having.”
The doctor implicitly said that when results like these happen, the marriage tends to be shaken. (WTF, she actually thought Bandi was what-fucking girls around?)
I knew it by heart it’s bullshit. Nobody in this world tells me shits like this. I know Bandi and that is final. Nobody knows Bandi like I do.
We have shared everything, you name it, even chewing gum. There’s no way we’re not sharing this virus either.
The doctor told us to wait for the second test. Maybe it was a mistake on the first test. We agreed on that.
Bandi and I flew back to Singapore the next day. We received an email from the doctor, a scanned document of Bandi’s lab result. It was still positive, it wasn’t borderline, it was way off positive, like seriously positive. The doctor advised Bandi not to share nail clipper, shaving razor, or anything personal with me.
Bandi took it to the next level. He didn’t let me drink from the same cup with him, eat from the same spoon, we even stopped making out for a while. Don’t even mention about sex. As much as I wanted to be selfish and demand everything to be back to normal, it couldn’t. I knew he went through so much, he was sad. All I did was hugging him all the time, telling him that we’re gonna kick this shit ass no matter what. His only concern was to pass it to our future baby. I told him not to think about it yet, the only priority is to make sure he’s okay.
During this time, we did a lot of google research and was comforted with the fact that Hepatitis C can be cured. It’s not the end of the world. But we decided to scrape off our Aussie plan and focus on eliminating this virus. I just want to live with Bandi, til 100 years old. I want to travel the world with him, and we will do anything to make sure it’s happening.
Bandi made appointment to see the top hepatologist in Singapore General Hospital (SGH), and only got an appointment 10 weeks later on 8th March.
In 2 months, Bandi went through the phase of sadness, anger, denial and acceptance.
I was in Jakarta for work when he went to his first doctor’s visit. I really wish I could be there with him. Bandi told me to wait til I came back to Singapore which was a day later, to discuss the detail. Doctor referred him to do another blood test, the very detailed one especially to understand how serious the HCV was doing in his body and how much time he had until the virus starting to affect his liver. This costed a whopping $790. (++)
I finally got to see him the next night. He picked me up in Changi Airport and we talked in the uber. He told me that he’s gonna apply for Singapore Citizen. I was shocked, “why?”
“The cost for curing Hepatitis C is 80,000 Singapore Dollars, but government subsidies it to be 12,000 for citizen. We cannot afford $80,000.”
My jaw dropped. Yes, and I cannot afford to lose you either.
I was puzzled. How on earth are we going to find $80,000?
“How much time do we need? When do you need to start the medication?”
“The result will come on 22 March, and I’ll meet the doctor again to understand about the medication plan. But don’t worry, we don’t need to do it ASAP.”
I was sad, and pissed off. Why is this happening to us? Bandi is the kindest, the sweetest, the most thoughtful human being I know. He doesn’t deserve this, he doesn’t deserve anything that can hurt him or make him sad. He only deserves happiness. Universe can hurt me instead. I’ll take bullet for him. I’m bulletproof anyway.
I went for another work trip to Jakarta, again on the same day when we had appointment with his doctor in SGH so he went alone again. I told him to let me know as soon as he had updates. So on Thursday morning, when I was eating breakfast in the hotel, I saw a missed call from Bandi. I called him back rightaway.
“I got nothing.”
“Doctor said the result from Singapore Lab says I’m clean.”
“WHAT THE FUCK?!”
“There goes 5 years of my life!!!”
“I know, but I’m so relieved.”
“I’m so gonna fucking sue Eka Hospital’s ass.”
“I don’t care. All I care is I’m healthy, and I’m gonna keep living my life with you. That’s the only thing I want.”
We continued the conversation with hundred of OMG I’m so relieved and I love you. I felt like I got even closer to Bandi. I know, I really think it’s impossible to be even closer to Bandi, but I felt like I was given a second chance.
I don’t know if any one of you can relate this. There are two ways of seeing it.
One, Eka Hospital ruined 3 months of our life, not to mention our sex life. I swear I gained wrinkles during this past 3 months. Our life was perfect before the incident and Eka Hospital ruined it for 3 months by giving us false alarm.
Two, We are the lucky ones. To be able to go through such whirlwind rollercoaster, and yet holding hands steady and strong, ready to kick ass. We felt like resetting the playstation button when our game starting to be sucky. We were given second chance.
In the end, of course we’re not suing. What is it for? Money? How much money can bring back the 3 months of our life? How much money can erase the tearful night that Bandi was having? We can’t get our 3 months back. The craziest, most worried 3 months in our life.
We’re so lucky we can ask for second (if not third) opinion in Singapore. But what if this happens to someone else who doesn’t have the fortune to do it (it costed $1,000 altogether from end to end) or even the stupid lab result could ruin their marriage?
How could Eka Hospital screwed up Bandi’s blood test TWICE, I don’t know, only god knows. But what we know, for sure is…
We’re always blessed, we’re always protected. We never doubt that. It’s us, Universe’s favourite people.
As long as we’re positive (no pun intended), and we’re together, nothing can hurt us. And even though it hurts, so what? it’s not about avoiding the pain, it’s about surviving it.
I still can’t believe such drama happened in our life. We didn’t tell anyone until today. But I’ve decided to share this story because:
- We’re warning you to choose hospital wisely. You wouldn’t want to experience their over-priced incompetence.
- If there is any doctor reading this, maybe there’s a scientific explanation behind the two different test results. I don’t speak medicine, so maybe incorrect process or method that caused this confusion? If so, what should the doctor do when facing this kind of situation? Obviously not passive-aggressively inducing ideas about dishonesty.
For now, I’m just happy and content with the fact that I can continue my plan, to live with Bandi til we’re 100 years old. :)
And don’t forget to say I love you to your loved ones. Why? Because why not? Life is short.
May (and Bandi), the lucky ones.