Two weddings and one funeral

I don’t remember having a normal night when I don’t have any plans for the next day. My life has been in a fast lane this past one month.
I don’t remember waking up late because I have been putting all my energy for the most important day in my life: wedding days. In my case I have two wedding days. So please double all the rempongness and the energy consuming.
7 June was the best day ever in my life and then followed by the hangover and the prep for the next wedding (exactly one week after that)
Then, 14 june was a blast for both of our family. They called it as the happiest wedding of their lives. Well, Bandi and I were under influence of course and we went along with it. It was a typical Chinese wedding with so many people we didn’t know, but well, as long as both parents were happy, we were happy too. The next day after the second wedding, I woke up at 5 am in the morning to watch Azzuri’s first match against England and we won!!! I thought to my self, could my life be anymore awesome?! Yes it could!!! Because we were flying to Maldives in 2 hours!!! Woot woot!!!
Bandi had prepared our honeymoon: one week in Maldives.
Our route was: Palembang – Batam -Singapore – KL – Male – Maldives (Medufushi Resort)
It was still a long way and we were so tired, but we sucked it up because we knew we would have one week to just lazying around in our private water villa. I already packed sunglasses, sunblock, novels, and new bikinis. I was sooooo thrilled that we could finally spend some alone time together and oh how I planned to f**k hard. Lol. (FYI I was on my period on my wedding day 7th june and all along we always spent the night with either friends or family, so yeah we never had sexy time)
When we landed in Batam at 10am in the morning, Bandi called home because he had a bad feeling. And he was right…. His grandpa just passed away. 12 hours after the wedding.
I’m a bad person because the first thing crosses my mind was… I was upset because obviously the honeymoon was cancelled.
Bandi told the cab driver to return back to Batam airport after we dropped Angel (my bridesmaid) to the ferry harbor. We bought a ticket back to Palembang later that night.
He told me that he was sorry that we had to cancel our honeymoon and that he knew I was physically super tired and obviously needed rest and we both know how tiring Chinese funeral could be, but he said we had to do the right thing. Life is only once, and if we do it right, once is enough.
It took me only a couple of minutes to remember why I married him in the first place. I married him because he’s kind and wonderful and I realize I just wanna be with him, whether it’s in maldives or in a funeral home. I married him because he puts people he loves first before himself, and I love him for that.
So we flew back to Palembang that night and we went straight to the hospital. He broke down and cried. I just held his hand and I thought to myself, from this day forward I would dedicate my life just to make sure he’s fine and he would never face anything alone anymore.
Suddenly losing Maldives didn’t feel so hurtful anymore. Because I would never lose this amazing man beside me, who would sacrifice anything and do anything for his family.
Maldives will always be there. But we can never turn back the time to the day we say our last goodbye to the people we love. To the day he say goodbye to his grandpa, a man who technically a father figure in his life since Bandi’s dad passed away.
Life is short and it is funny and ironic sometimes.
We just danced happily on our wedding, and we received so many flower arrangements saying “congratulation on your wedding” and now just 24 hours later we cried and received another flower arrangements saying “deep condolences”
Ain’t life funny?
We could laugh sarcastically, but why should we be bitter, when we could just laugh along with it?
Yesterday afternoon his grandpa was finally buried and he said his last goodbye. It was very emotional for him and all I could do just be there… Just to hold his hand.
Tonight we will fly back to Singapore to take Bandi’s brother to hospital because he’s sick.
I hope everything will be fine eventually. So we made a vow to always be with each other for good times and bad times, and the bad times stroke first, so what?
As long as we’re together, nothing seem so bad anyway. :)

Death ends life, not relationship – Mitch Albom

May, Palembang 19 June 2014.


#30daysblogging Introduction to my family

Day 20

Post is an idea from Debhoy.

Debhoy’s comment made me realize that I seldom talk about my family. I didn’t really have any particular reason, it’s not that I did that on purpose. I just didn’t have a lot of things to talk about. First of all, I love faraway from them and I only exchange messages with them once every two weeks or a month sometimes. I don’t call. Lack of contacts create no story whatsoever so I never talk about them. If I compare with Bandi whom I communicate with daily or my friends whom I text with or facetime with daily, of course the portion of the story is a lot smaller.

I love my family. I grew up with them. There’s nothing wrong with them, really. :) It’s just a normal family with dysfunctional parents and brother and sister. I mean, aren’t all families dysfunctional?

My dad is a loving and humble man. He loves animals so much, including cockroaches. Yes, he doesn’t wanna ever kill cockroaches. I’ve got my animal lover trait from him, obviously. He’s artsy, good with pencil. When he got his first heart attack when I was 7 years old, he lost control of his right hand, so he stopped drawing. But then he learned how to use his left hand. After he recovered years later, he was able to write and draw with both hands. So I guess I’ve got my artsy and never-give-up trait from him too. :)

My mom is a neurotic, OCD-freak and unstable. She didn’t love my dad when she married him, and she still doesn’t. Thus, I always remember to never marry someone with the wrong reasons. I’ve seen the outcome for the first 18 years of my life living with them. My mom loves art too. She loves painting, reading and writing. She writes a lot! We used to share books and novels when we still lived together. She was the one who introduced me to the most delicious drink in the whole world: coffee. Yes, she was a coffee addict. When I was in high school, we used to hang out in the afternoon drinking coffee together. :) I’ve got her writing talent and her love for arts, and also her caffeine addiction. :)

They were both great people, but they married the wrong people and with the wrong reason, and they weren’t happy in most of the times during their marriage. I learned a lot that marrying the wrong person could turn your life upside down. No matter what, love has to be the foundation of the marriage. Other things could follow.

I have one big sister who is a kindergarten principal. She’s easy going and fun. She’s married with two awesome kids. The oldest is Kimiko, my favorite one! (Ssst! I shouldn’t pick a favorite. LOL) In the middle between me and my sister is my brother. He was a rebel and a big trouble for the family, but anyway, things have been better. He is actually a person with a good heart. And guess what is he doing for a living? He’s a game master! It’s like MY DREAM JOB! He works for Indonesian based game company as a game master, somebody who test the game before it’s being launched to public! Whaaaat?!

So, that’s my family. Twisted, troubled, yet fun and warm.

I’m not mentally close with my family, maybe because we didn’t love together for so long. My sister went to Bandung when I was 10 years old, after that I’ve never lived with her anymore. My brother went to China when I was 16 years old and then when I was 18, I moved out from my house. Now my mom and dad lived with my brother and 7 dogs (and counting!) Yes, my dad likes to have a looooooooot of dogs. Not that my house is big, but he feed all the stray dogs daily so all the stray dogs guard our house every night. :)

But I go home once in a while and visit them. I keep in touch with them too, of course. :) Blood is thicker than water, so I never worry that time or distance will drift us apart. :)


May, the emotional one.