#30daysblogging Is everyone capable or raising a child?

Day 12

Post is an idea from Nancy

There are three things I have never liked to post about: 1. about my parents or my parental family; 2. about my work; 3. about children (my future children)

However, when Nancy gave a thought provoking topic, I couldn’t say no to talk about children. Well at least we’re talking children in general, not mine.

I have made a post before regarding whether everyone is capable of falling in love, and I haven’t got the answer yet now I’m talking about the other sensitive question. She asked whether everyone is capable of raising a child?

Not giving birth, not being pregnant or putting your sperm onto someone’s ovary, not being a mother/parent technically, but raising a child.

Thankfully for this one, I have my pretty fixed opinion.

My opinion is… NO. I don’t I think everyone is capable of raising a child.

Some were born to have nurturing trait and they dreamed to have kids and when they actually have one they are good at raising them. These people are good parents. They love their kids unconditionally, give the best to their kids and the most important is… THEY NEVER COMPLAIN. They love being parents.

Some were born without the nurturing trait yet they are willing to learn and they are willing to sacrifice their selfish time for the kids. They’re probably not the perfect parents that society approves for but they work hard to be parent.

Some were just born selfish. They love themselves too much it’s impossible to put someone else’s priority above them. These people should not have kids. Yet, a lot still turned up to be one. Oh well… It is lucky (or smart) of she/he married somebody who has the nurturing trait, however I always believe that good parenting comes from a teamwork between father and mother.

For women, the pressure of being parent is bigger than the men. In our society, you are not a woman before you give birth. You are not whole as a woman. Your purpose as a woman is to give birth and be mother.


So I’m not a woman if I don’t have kids? So my vagina fails? F%#K You!

I hate those people who said “The real woman must give birth, so they become whole.” WTF, this is so wrong. I can’t imagine if somebody wanting to be whole as a woman and ended up pregnant and then she gave birth and then she thought WTF is this, nothing changed, oh no, I didn’t want the baby! So freaking twisted! She didn’t have a replay button, oh no!

Everyone is entitled to their opinion, I know. But everyone is also entitled to their decision whether they want or don’t want to have kids. Some stupid women let other people make decision for them!

Some people are so selfish and twisted and vain and when they became mother, they would so gonna ruin the child. I’m talking about Snooki and Farrah Abraham for examples. I’m not judging. They’re just victim of the ugly society (and broken condoms).

Because of this pressure for the society, a lot of selfish women were being pregnant half-heartedly… And who is the victim? The children… :(

Complaining moms are normal. I mean, if they complained like “Oh man, teaching my daughter Math is impossible!” or “My kids ruin my backyard again, Graaawh!” it’s totally fine. But when you read something like “Oh, it’s nice of you to go to that party while I’m stuck with my crying baby at home. X(” on facebook and the endless complains from new moms how spending time with their baby is sad, you know something is wrong.

Why would someone complain having a baby when you were the one who wanted it at the first place?

Don’t. Just don’t.

You don’t have to have a baby.

Or if you’re not ready, you don’t have to have a baby NOW. You don’t have to rush things because it’s not only your life, it’s an innocent baby’s life on stake.

Ok, I don’t want to start blabbering about this issue having child too soon because I will so gonna repeat what I said on this post. (anyway that post is one of my best blabbering ever. LOL)

So yeah, the conclusion is… Not everyone is capable of raising a child.

I mean, technically yes, everyone could raise a child, but raising a child in a proper way for the kids to be healthy physically and mentally, NO.

The kids must have some mental problem (don’t be ashamed almost everyone have at least one) or some traumas when they were raised in a disturbing environment i.e. parents fighting all the time, lack of parent’s love and/or attention. It’s just the saddest. :(

I’m not a mom, so you can say this is bullshit and I don’t know how it feels to raise kids or have kids, well you’re right I DON’T. So this might be a bullshit. But I don’t rush it. I admit it to the freaking world that I’m not ready. It’s so weird when people ask about “Oh you’re getting married? How many kids do you want?”

Wait wait wait hold on. Getting married is not equal with having kids. They are two different things. It’s like asking “Oh you’re buying a plasma TV? How many cupcakes do you want?” Not related.

Oh well, I should really stop typing before I make Bandi even more nervous. LOL. Relax Bandi, if you read this, I DO WANT TO HAVE YOUR KID(S) SOMEDAY, ok? Geez, relax!

And I’m gonna tell you. I’m gonna be a great mom. I will. someday.



May, screwing off before it gets to hormon-y

Five things to bitch about… instagram

Hey-hoooo!!! After months of my error unfix-able instagram, I finally created a new account of instagram and enjoyed stalking people’s photos. Somehow you feel like knowing them just by stalking their instagram. Instagram is like a modern version of photo album. Do you agree? =)

This makes me remember why I joined instagram at the first place. It is fun to browse people’s online photo album. Do you remember when we were kids and we went to our relative’s house and they showed us their photo albums? it’s like a very nice personal gesture. That was the traditional instagram.

I love instagram, but yeah, since it’s me… I also find things to bitch about. Again, my bitching post is not suitable for people who are over-sensitive. I don’t want anyone to NOT AGREE with me. If you don’t like it, suck it up! Haha!


1. Don’t post something like this…

Photo 11-7-13 3 18 46 PM

when you were actually marrying a rich man.

That doesn’t make sense! You’re NOT A RICH WIFE! You’re freaking rich because you married a rich man! Oh and just because you posted this photo, we would think you weren’t into his money. YEAH RIGHT. Because you quit your job and went shopping around with your his credit card after married show your affection as A RICH WIFE. Bravo. Bravo.

And… Don’t post something like this…

Photo 25-6-13 6 02 29 PM

When you are obviously in an unhealthy relationship, when everyone knows your boyfriend is cheating or the ones that annoyed me the most, people who got married after 3 months relationship. If you agree with Oprah, YOU’LL TAKE SLOWER PACE. Or you just simply don’t read.

It is your freedom to post anything you want, as much as you can say anything you want, but don’t be the opposite of what YOU ARE DOING lah, it looks damn stupid you know!

2. The spammers in the comment.

Such as… “Sis, dilihat barangnya di IG kita @whyshouldicare”. Yeah I understand you try to sell, but it’s annoying. And I didn’t marry your brother. (LOL I know this joke is so old.)

When I stalk some celebrity’s instagram, the spammer is HORRIBLE. They talk shits and argue in the comments when the celebrity himself doesn’t even read it. Geez.

3. Syahrini’s hashtags on her instagram

Photo 11-7-13 3 21 05 PM Photo 11-7-13 3 20 43 PM

This is partly my fault because of my keponess I browse Syahrini’s instagram, but yeah, I admit it, IT WAS AN ENTERTAINMENT! Hahahahahahaha!

Uncle Robert also agrees!

I also sometimes feel sad to those who put like 50 hashtags on her photos. I don’t know about you, but for me it’s too much, it’s like a girl wearing too much make up and scream “Look at me! Look at me! Please look at me!”

4. A selfie video.

Why? Because it’s awkward!!! Seeing a selfie photo these days (I admit I did that too back then but now?) is already awkward. A video? Really?

It’s like you trying to shoot some selfie…. in front of hundreds of people. AWKWARD. JUST AWKWARD! Please don’t do that agaaaainnn!!!! (Unless you’re Cristiano Ronaldo)

5. #like4like

SERIOUSLY? Who started this???? You must be tied with sharks and cobras while riding the fastest missile and thrown to the most dangerous volcano (like El Macho!) Haha! (Spoiler alert! oops, too late.)

It is common to follow back people who follows you, just to see what they’re up to, and you are free to unfollow them anytime you want. But liking people’s photo just because they like your photo? Isn’t it stupid? It’s like you’re a person who cannot decide what you like or what you want.

But seriously, who started it? Isn’t it the stupidest idea ever? LIKE FOR LIKE? So everytime I like your photo, you will like my photo back? Geez… shits people do to be famous.

But yeah yeah yeah, it’s your instagram you can do and post anything you want. If I don’t like it, I should not follow you. YES THAT’S TRUE.

This is only me, bitching.


Hmm, so what’s next for bitching, ya? *gosok gosok dagu*


May, back to stalking.

5 things to bitch about

Hey-ho! I’m back and ready for bitching!!!

Disclaimer: Not for those who are overly sensitive about everything.

I’ve been in a sour mood these couple of days because of my bloated tummy, which is my own fault because I’ve been snacking too much Pringles and eat no fruit at all. Guess the PMS is attacking.

Anyhow, I don’t have any moral-of-the-story kind of post to write about, so I will be writing what I’m really good at: bitching. Haha!

Long time ago, someone told me that my blog had so many positive posts and had inspired him, which flattered me of course. It is true that I mostly write about dare to dream, being positive and believe on things. I am a positive person, I know that. But if you know me in a real life, you would probably realize this: I bitch A LOT.

As much as I want to keep my bitching in the real life only and filter my output on my blog to be mostly positive (because I like to re-read my posts over and over again and love to see the positive posts) sometimes I couldn’t help to bitch out. It turns out my post of bitching about marriage hit my personal record of daily hit. The hit is doubled up from the usual hit. Guess people love to see some dirt.

So I told myself, it’s okay for you to bitch out once in a while. It’s nice to bitch out and be heard. If people get offended, then it’s their problem.

Owkaayy, enough for the prologue. In this post, I will talk about the top five things that I found useless and wasting money and time. Some of you might not agree, but again, that’s your problem. I’m not looking for a validation, I’m just bitching. X-p

Buying branded bags

Seriously, I don’t know why people would buy a bag for a freaking $3,000?!!! I’ve been trying to put a sense into that but seriously, the more I think about it, the more confused I get. I tried once to talk to my friends who love to buy branded bags and they said when women get older, they’ll want it. Branded bags are like wisdom, you’ll get it when you’re matured enough. (What? Really?)

I think I’ve grown enough to call myself woman, and still I don’t want that, even the cheaper version like LV. Let me get this straight first: In Singapore, it is very common for a man to buy his date an LV bag. The cost of LV bag is about S$1,200 which should only cost about 20-25% or a man’s monthly salary. It’s like a society validation to prove that you are capable to feed your woman. (Or implicitly telling that you have money to shower a girl with gifts.)

It is pretty common for a guy to buy his lady an LV bag (or Chanel or Prada if he’s richer) on A FIRST DATE. It shows that he wants to be serious in a relationship. Ohhh… What a messed up world we live in.

When Bandi and I were hanging out with my friends who talk about branded bags, one of my friend’s boyfriend asked Bandi “Have you prepared to buy May a bag?” and Bandi was laughing, “She’s not into bag.” Then the girls stared at me in disbelief, “No waaaay!!! Maybe you just haven’t found the right bag!”

No Ladies, I have found mine. This Mango Bag I’ve been using for the last 2 years costed only $60. You want to talk about quality? I wear this bag every single day for the last 2 years to work! How’s that for a $60 quality?? Geez!

It’s not like I’m very stingy to spend time for my looks. I’m still a girl who loves to shop. But buying a $3,000 bag is just….. Arrgh, I can’t find the right word for it. Let me know if you find one.

And and and… there’s this ‘tradition’ in Singapore that the man will be the one who brings his lady’s bag.

What’s the point of having a branded bag if you ask your boyfriend holding it??? And men, if you’re holding your girlfriend’s bag, you’re a pussy!!!

Rhoma Irama running for President.

He’s running for president. It’s literally running for the position of president of Indonesia. Literally. Oh how I wish it meant running towards the president. OH!!!!

He’s REALLY thinking about running for president. REALLY.

What, wait, REALLY??? REALLY????


Do you really want me to start bitching about it? Do you??? DO YOU?!!!

(Let’s just pretend I never talk about Rhoma Irama on my blog.)

Okay… NEXT!

Going abroad with tour

I know a lot of people doing this but this really doesn’t make sense to me. Why people are using some touristy Tour Agent’s itinerary and just sit back and relax on the tour bus, when planning a trip is a fun part of the traveling itself? And remember, it’s not an adventure unless you’re lost somewhere.

It’s not like I’m a travel agent-virgin. I do go on a day tour like Phi-Phi Island Tour or Halong Bay Tour because apparently that’s the only way to go. I also will give excuse if you on tour with your parents because some parents don’t like adventure and they just want to go jalan-jalan on a tour. But seriously, I don’t understand why young people want to go on a travel agent’s tour such as “8 magical day in Korea” or “15 amazing days in Australia”. Geez, what’s so magical and amazing about sitting on a bus with people talking about a foreign culture on your own laguage?!

Isn’t traveling worth more than just taking pictures of yourself and a landmark? It’s supposed to be meeting local people, eating local food, get lost in a foreign city and find your way back and learn something new.

Traveling is the only thing you buy that makes you richer.

Remember that. =)

If the old folks who didn’t have internet back then could go abroad without a tour, then your excuse of “I don’t know anything about the country” should just go to hell.

People watching “Keeping up with The Kardashians”

Enough said.

Pre-wedding photo

Until now, I don’t understand what’s the purpose of pre-wedding photo? Please please tell me what the purpose is. If it’s simply for fun, then it’s an expensive useless fun. I don’t understand why can’t we just use the photos from holiday or possible one-time indoor studio for a header photo of your wedding? Should we really pay so much money for taking photos on our wedding gown, pretend to melancholy glare to some sunset further away?

Don’t be offended. It’s individual preference to do pre-wedding photoshot. Some of my close friends do that and I still say this in front of their faces, “For me it’s useless.” But hey, everyone is different, if you wanted to do it then do it, regardless how mean I might bitch about it.

Isn’t pre-wedding photoshot expensive? And Why do most people choose pre-wed photos over a honeymoon?! Why why whhhyyyy???

I really don’t get it why people do that… whhhhyyyy? Why don’t you just use the pictures you already had when you were two dating? Why do you need to spend extra money just for a pre-wed photos? I reaaaally don’t understand.

I will give an excuse if it’s free. But paying for pre-wed photos? Who would do that???

Well, I never plan any wedding, maybe I don’t know shit about how wedding should be. Maybe it is supposed to be with pre-wed photos. But, aren’t wedding supposed to be whatever you want to?

But again, if you want to spend money for pre-wed photos, it’s your call. It’s your money anyway. I hope it’ll be well spent. (NOT)

Ahhhh, what am I talking about? I never had a branded bag, never met Rhoma Irama in person, never went on a tour trip, never watched “Keeping up with the Kardashians” and never planned a wedding. What do I know, right??

So yeah, now my blog is not so inspirational anymore, huh, Keven? Hahaha.


May, bitching out online.