Til we meet again in the Paradise of free souls

Dear Koko,  
I promise I will not be bitter, because love is stronger than regrets.

I bid you the most loving farewell with what I’m best at, writing.

You’re embarking a beautiful journey to the paradise of free souls.

Where pain no longer exists and sadness is long gone.

There is only love, eternal and pure love.

Where you can play guitar and sing as many Richie Ren’s songs as you want.

And you can dance with our late dogs, Dodol, Coka, Cassey, and the others in the rainbow bridge.

Send my best kisses for them too, I will join you all in my time.

Where you can build a fort made up of pillows and pretended you were a king who made so many non-sense rules, just like when we were kids.

You used to boss me around and I frowned but little did I know, that’s what brothers do.

We have a very unique relationship, that only we understand. The kind that’s truly ours. And it will be continuing, our relationship is eternal, just like my memory of you.

There is no longer grudge, we’ve forgiven each other and we’ve passed all the fights and the sad words said. I will still be tearing up remembering you… You know, all the phrase… Delusion, reminiscent, devastation, resentment.

I’m still on earth afterall, embedded with emotions.

But deep down I know for sure, someday I’ll see you again in the paradise of free souls.

You, with your cheeky grin, will be handing me a playstation controller, “ready for another FF game?”

For now… this is the end of your earthly adventure.

You will always be my brother, for death ends only your life, not our relationship.

When I let go off your ashes in the sea, I knew that wherever beach I will go, I will see you. Our relationship will continue, it didn’t end becuause you died, it carries on. You are in my heart for always.

Til we meet again, Koko. I will always remember you.

Your strong and independent sister that you’re proud of,


Cirque du Soleil, Essena Onneil and the good news!

There are no catch from the title, they are exactly 3 things I want to talk about in this post. Circus, social media, and good news!


Bandi and I went to watch Totem by Cirque du Soleil last Friday and it was amazing!!! I seriously couldn’t express how amazing it was in words! They took insanity to another level! Just as I thought it was crazy enough, BOOM! They did another unthinkable show. Just watch it if you have a chance or if they ever come to your city!

Bandi and I, super excited!

Bandi and I, super excited!

The cast!

The cast!

Social Media

You’ve probably heard about Essena O’Neill, a girl (model?) who quits instagram because she lost the meaning of real life. Oooh… sounds pretty serious huh?

By the way I wrote the sentence you would understand my side of this quitting instagram crap. Yeah, I found her move to be a bit hypocrite. She quit instagram, blamed social media for making her doing what she didn’t want to do.

Geez, to cut my preach shot. Let me give you the same situation of her excuses:

  1. A teenager blames sex (without protection) for getting pregnant.
  2. A person blames the candle for burning her house.
  3. A police office blames his gun for shooting the wrong person.


Hey Essena, It’s not instagram, IT’S YOU.

It’s not instagram who lies, it’s you who are the LIAR.

It’s not nuclear or gunfire who created war, it’s the fucking politicians.

I know it’s easier to blame the tool instead of sitting down, thinking what went wrong with me and admit it to the world that you did something wrong and you will fix it.

You know why people say facebook is bad? Because people can’t stop comparing themselves with other people when they read the newsfeed.

Oh… my high school friend just got her new BMW car. Why couldn’t I get BMW?

Oh… even the ugliest person I know is having a boyfriend. Why am I single?

Oh… This guy went on another holiday again? I didn’t even go anywhere this year. I don’t have anything to post, nothing to show off!

And there you go, BAM! You become depressed when you were actually perfectly fine, single and happy.

It’s not the facebook, not the instagram, not the tool that you should blame! It’s YOURSELVES, people! Yes, you can blame instagram if that will make you feel better (temporarily) but we know it won’t solve your problem.

In this very very vague yet transparent life, I know it’s not easy to be true to yourself, to be authentic, but try your best to be honest. Honesty is like a jewel now and be that jewel. :)

You will never be happy being somebody that you’re not. Be the real you, even though the real you is narcissistic and vain, just admit it… at least you’re being honest.

We all love to see ourselves in the mirror and adore ourselves, what’s wrong with that? It gives us happiness, confidence. As long as we’re not trashing people down, who cares about being vain?

You can be whoever you want, as long as it’s not fake.

Now you know I’m pro social media. Of course I’m pro! What’s not to like? You gotta be kay-poh on other people’s life leeeh! Xp You can stalk Cristiano Ronaldo’s instragram or your ex-boyfriend’s facebook. LOL.

Good News

I have a good news I couldn’t wait to tell you guys!!! I’ve held it for so many months now I will officially announce that…

Bandi and I are…

finally official resident of Singapore!


We’ve been waiting for the verdict for a year and last September it was finally approved. :)

It’s been five years since I moved to Singapore for good. It’s been one hell of amazing ride, looking forward for many more of amazing things happen in this life. =)

Now, I’m sharing one of my favorite quote that always gets me excited about life:


May, always excited.

The Legendary Pacific Coast road trip

Bandi and I went to Australia! Woot! It’s our first time in Australia and Bandi’s fifth continent! He technically has traveled around the world. :)

I can’t wait to visit my forth and fifth continent too.

Anyway, where did we go in Australia? It’s quite difficult to answer this question in a short sentence because we didn’t just go to 1 or 2 cities, we went to tens of them. How? Because we did a road trip.

So, here’s our map:

Pacific Roadtrip

If you’re interested in building an itinerary, I recommend you to visit this website.

Well, every adventure has its own charm, so does this one. I personally love road trip, but I can’t drive. I feel so blessed that Bandi would do it for me because he knows how much I love road trip. :)

Road trip is more fun, more relaxing, you can see more things and stop by wherever you want. It has more freedom and I lovvvvvvvvvveeeeee freedom. :p

I will not tell the technicality of the stories like when did I go to this place, how long is the distance etc etc, I will list our stops below and tell you my story. Every stops are unique, but you will find out which on is my favorite. This will help you if you want to build a road trip itinerary of your own.

Anyway, this post will not be helpful if you want to visit Australia with public transportation, because we hired a car, so I don’t know a thing about Australia’s public transportation. So all the places we went to, we drove there,


Gold coast is overrated. We decided we won’t stay long in Gold Coast because it was full of tourists. Sure it was warm and the beach was nice, but everything there is more expensive and more touristy. Anyway, we went to Surfer’s Paradise and had our lunch there, waled around for a while and had to pay $8 parking for 1 freaking hour. Talking about expensive…


Byron bay was also full of tourists… but we love it! haha! Double standard! I’ve been livin in a city my whole life, so I always prefer small town for holiday destination. I love small town’s charm and Byron Bay has it. Our host at Byron Bay was sooo friendly and warm, contrary to Byron Bay’s weather that was super cold!

If you put in Byron Bay in your road trip destination list, remember this: VISIT THE LIGHTHOUSE. Seriously pretty view from the lighthouse, and have some walk! You will reach to a most east point of Australia. And have I said, the view is spectacular!!! If you’re lucky, you can see whales or Dolphins!

You have to pay AUD$7 for a car if you drive here, but hey you get a free parking!

The Byron Bay Lighthouse

The Byron Bay Lighthouse

Bandi, trying to do some yoga shits with sunset as background. LOL

Bandi, trying to do some yoga shits with sunset as background. LOL

We walked around the most east trail of Australia

We walked around the most east trail of Australia

Spoiled by this view.

Spoiled by this view.


Nimbin is just so…… unique! First of all, it is a drug town, marijuana to be exact. So if you’re extremely against marijuana, don’t come here at the first place. Nimbin is also a hippie town. It is a very small town where the community believe in everything organic, non-corporation-related, free-trade and also believe in healing stones, tarot reading and using weeds as medicine.

It was so interesting to see the town itself and see the people, I visited some of the stores are all of them were so unique and fun! It is a definitely must-see if you’re around Byron Bay area. it’s about 1 hour driving (or 2 hours driving if you decided to choose the longer route-but more scenic- like we did).

Cute little town!

Cute little town!

Some Psychic doing her thing.

Some Psychic doing her thing.

Even the apothecary sign was cute!

Even the apothecary sign was cute!


Ballina was very…. quiet! I think we only met total of 20 people there. Haha. Yes, it was so quiet and big, but the beach was beautiful. I didn’t get to learn a lot about this town as we didn’t really spend a lot of time here. We just went to watch waves crashing the coast, and took some lovey-dovey pictures of course. :)








Lennox head is a charming little beach town. I had one of the best salad in my life here! Groovers Cafe is the name (if you ever visit Lennox head, give it a try) which also served awesome sweet potato chips.

The beach was as fantastic as the other beaches we saw in Autralia’s pacific coast line. Can I just make a statement now that there are no best beaches in Australia, all beach has its own charm and atmosphere. Basically all you have to do is just drive from Brisbane to Sydney and stop wherever you want and visit the beach. The whole coastline is beautiful.

A walk along the lake.

A walk along the lake.


Bandi and I went bushwalking to korogoro track, the loop one. I think there are three or four different walking tracks. It was drizzling at first but we didn’t hesitate. The track was easy at first, however it became more advance later on. The view when we reached on the top of the hill where the gap was, was REALLY AMAZING. It was raining and nobody was there so it was a bit spooky, so we hurried up back to our base, if it was sunny, I would spend hours there just to watch the sea. :)
We saw kangaroos too, living wild. Ahh…. it’s a privilege to see wild animals as a city girl. :) We didn’t really take many pictures because it was drizzling the whole time. Look at our wet hair!

Raining and hiking!

Raining and hiking!




A short stopover at Coffs Harbour before we reach South West Rock. We bought a fresh caught fish turned to Fish and Chips here. OMG! Australia has the best Fish and Chips! Nothing can beat fresh seafood! We also had fresh prawns and squids! Yum!


I had the best airbnb experience in South West Rock! Our host, Shirley and Mick were soooo friendly and super nice people. They brought us around their beautiful tiny little town. The town was so small, it doesn’t have any traffic lights! It has 5,000 population and has only 1 primary school. So when their kid grew up and entered high school, the kid had to go to high school in the neighbor town.

South West Rock is famous among local Australians and divers. We saw the Fish Rock, a famous diving site and went up to the lighthouse but it was to windy to actually go up to the lighthouse. So we detour to watch cute kangaroos around the lighthouse instead. :)

Wild Kangaroos

Wild Kangaroos

Our sweet sweet host, Mick and Shirley.

Our sweet sweet host, Mick and Shirley.

Found a baby kangaroo that was sticking out! Super cuteeee!

Found a baby kangaroo that was sticking out! Super cuteeee!

South West Rock has so many lookout points that have spectacular views! Here are the photos to give you ideas!

What a view

What a view. Universe is awesome, isn’t it?

And old jail with breathtaking view around.

And old jail with breathtaking view around.

The beach!

The beach!

I really really enjoyed South West Rock. In the evening, Bandi and I had the best dinner we’ve had in Australia in a Restaurant called Seabreeze, which is also a hotel. Go ahead an try it if you’re there!


A short stopover at Port macquarie, a small city 2 hours from South West Rock. I fell in love with this small town and promised myself to come back again someday. :)

First stop was a Koala Hospital. There was no injured Koala on the operating table, so thanks goodness everyone is in good condition. So we just visited them in their ward, most of them were sleeping. Do you know that Koala needs to sleep at least 20 hours a day to digest the eucalyptus leaves? :)

Look at this cutieeee!

Look at this cutieeee!

And then we visited Roto’s House, which is a heritage house from the world war era. We went there accidentally actually but I enjoyed it! :)

The entrance of Roto House

The entrance of Roto House

Hanging out at Roto's Balcony

Hanging out at Roto’s Balcony

We walked around the park and sat to discuss where to go next.

We walked around the park and sat to discuss where to go next.

Then we went to the most beautiful small cafe in the outskirt of Port Macquarie, that is also a vineyard. Sooooo beautiful. Ah… I just loved Australia so much!

Isn't it beautiful?

Isn’t it beautiful?

You + Me. We're invincible.

You + Me. We’re invincible, together.


We reached Port Stephens quite late and went out for Dinner at Nelson Bay. There was only 1 town centre which has the boat docks, some restaurants and some shops. We had the Hog’s Breath, a steak chain in Australia that we’ve been eye-ing on. The steak was not so bad though, but not that fantastic either.

I remember when I talked to our host, an artist who was born in Easter Europe and had lived in Australia for so long, “you’re very funny!”, because she kept making jokes with us. her reply was something that I will remember, “Ain’t it the only way to live?”

Yes, we should not take life so seriously. Life is funny, so should we. =)

Her house was beautiful and we stayed in the floral themed bedroom, sadly we stayed there only for a night, a short night, because the next morning, around 5 am, we had already checked out for our Dolphins adventure. WILD Dolphins! WOOHOO!!! So excited!

As written in some of my blog post, I’m passionately against dolphins in captivity. If you understand about this issue and you still go to those sad dolphins show, we have trust issue, my friend. If you know nothing about it, please read my post here, and learn something new today and educate yourself. =)

We went on a boat trip and it was a bumpy ride. Bandi has zero tolerance on sea motion, so he swallowed some pills and knocked out in the boat. Not fun, huh? Haha.

I was cheering and singing with the other crews and swimmers on the front deck, calling for Dolphins. After some ride away from the bay, we met them! Oh…. I couldn’t stop smiling when I saw them… Swimming freely in the ocean, making happy noises, jumping up and over in the sea. Such beautiful and smart creature. I learned another fact about dolphins, when you sing louder, they will jump higher and show off to us even more! They’re such happy creature! Some of the participants went into the sea and swam along with the dolphins. Don’t worry we didn’t do anything or change anything about them. They were free and happy!

Sadly, I don’t have so much pictures of the excursion trip because I kept my phone safe in my pocket and didn’t want to risk dropping it into the sea. :p

So here’s the only picture I captured from my Dolphins video.

Happy dolphins.

Happy dolphins.


Before we hit Sydney, we made a quick stop to have a late lunch in Newcastle, like usual Fish and Chips and coffee. Newcastle is a satellite city of Sydney which has a number of car dealerships, factories and big buildings. I felt it’s more like Karawang or Bekasi.

Nothing special here and I barely took photos. Next!


Sydney… Sydney… Sydney… the most expensive city we’ve ever been in our life! $8 for 30 minutes carpark? $17 for one-way trip (so freaking near) from Airport to town? Zoo was $56? Geez…. It surely costs a lot to live here.

Thankfully we got free parking in our airbnb, I couldn’t imagine how much we pay for overnight parking.

Our first stop in Sydney was to meet CALEB, the cutest baby in Instagram! LOLOLOL

Dian, Caleb and me! This photo took thousands of takes! LOL

Dian, Caleb and me! This photo took thousands of takes! LOL

Caleb was super cutttttttttttttteeeeeeeeeeeeee! Now I want a baby! :p

Anyway, finally I got to meet Dian (I don’t even hyperlink your blog anymore cause it’s dead), we’ve been missing each other very long. She’se been providing me with airport tax money, bus card and sending me cute postcards, she’s like my sugar mama. XD Thanks for all the fun time Dian! I will be back to Australia!

Sydney is surely a beautiful city with the pretty bay full of boats and birds contrasted with some old buildings. I enjoyed Sydney a lot and it has awesome Thai food (one of the perks of big city – good international food).

A city by the bay is always good idea.

A city by the bay is always good idea.

Bondi Beach

Bondi Beach

Yellow wildflowers!

Yellow wildflowers!

Awesome stuff!

Awesome stuff!

This is like the BEST IDEA ever, riiiiight?

This is like the BEST IDEA ever, riiiiight?

And before I left Sydney and went back to Singapore, guess what happened? My flight was delayed for about 6 hours and it was a blessing in disguise because I got to meet my gurl, Tannia! We thought we would miss each other because she will land when I fly out but now we could meet!

The foxy global trotter

The foxy global trotter

And during September, we got to meet at Surabaya (Bromo trip), Kuala Lumpur (for Bon Jovi concert) and now here in Sydney! If it wasn’t meant to be when I don’t know what is. :D


We took one day off from Sydney to visit Blue Mountain and it was gorgeousssss! I loveeee it! My only regret was not to pay parking tickets for longer hour so I could hike longer and explored more.

If you intend to visit Blue mountans without hiking/bushwalking, you may spare only 1 hour here just to visit three sisters, but if you want to hike, spare minimum 5 hours because the trail was a bit tough.

We paid our parking ticket for only 4 hours and ended up panicking because we had to come back ASAP. Bandi left me with our friend (who joined us on the ride) and he ran to the car just to make sure we didn’t get fine tickets. hahahaha

The stairs were horrible!

The stairs were horrible!

Three Sisters from far far away

Three Sisters from far far away



The tiny waterfall.

The tiny waterfall.

After the super-tiring hike, we thought we wanted to chill a little bit before we drove back to Sydney, so we read some local newspaper and found a garden in nearby town called Leura. It was an impromptu trip, so we went there and it was a pretty little town! :)

A friend asked us to take this photo. so cute!

A friend asked us to take this photo. so cute!

I wanna have a garden this pretty! :D

I wanna have a garden this pretty! :D

So yeah… the journey was fun, amazing and full of coffee. LOL. WE LOVE AUSTRALIAAAA! And I want to come back so so so badly! I even thought about having a gap month to explore Australia. Watch out Europe, you have a competition! Haha!

But of course Europe is full of beautiful history, ruins, museums and old building, while Australia is full of unique wildlife, beautiful beaches and amazing national parks. There are totally 2 different adventures.

I found something new: I LOVE BUSHWALKING! (But only when the weather is cold, so I don’t get all sweaty) Australia is full of unique animals so when we bushwalked, we would meet porcupine, kangaroos, rare birds and other interesting animals that I didn’t even know their names. And Australians are friendly and happy people so we enjoyed everything there actually!

I can’t wait to plan my next Australia Trip! :D

And to sum up our Great Pacific Roadtrip, here’s the video that I made! (I have a new hobby to make 1 summary video per trip so in the future when I feel like remembering the trip, I will just play the video; instead of scrolling to thousands of photos. :p)



May, adventure-ing

Photo 24-9-15, 3 02 23 PM

Snakes, Nanoblock, Rainbow Hair and Chir Chir

Surprised! I’m blogging!

That’s supposed to be sarcastic coz I’ve been so lazy to blog, but I pushed myself today to open the laptop and just write whatever I feel like writing.

This post may not be in good quality, I warn you, but at least I write something.

I even had one dream about my blog when somebody screaming to my face “you’re a bad writer! your blog is rubbish!” and I woke up feeling really really sad. Yeah I mean I know I’m not a published writer or anything, but I always thought I’m a decent writer laaahh. This is the only thing I love constantly throughout my life. No matter which boyband I was obsessed with, which Final Fantasy game I was playing, which hobby I was into, I’ve always loved writing.

So when I had that dream, it was like a wake up call. Going back to writing, May! You don’t have to write a comprehensive feminist article (which is my favorite kind of writings of all btw), at least just post something!

So anywaaaay….. here I am.

Talking about dreams… Last night I dreamt I was bitten by snakes (yes plural) and it was really scary and painful. I woke up feeling so scared and insecure. I looked up in google and it turned out if you dream about snakes, there are 2 possibilities:

One: You’re scared about something. Your subconscious is afraid of some commitment.

Two: You’re healing from a fear.

Well… Guess what happened last night? Bandi and I argued about kids. He didn’t want kids right here right now but at least he wanted to know if I ever wanted to go somewhere. Sigh… I don’t want to talk more about this on my blog, it could go on and on and on for 10 pages of my excuses of why I’m not ready and trust me it’s annoying.

And just after that argument, I had nightmare about snake. Bummer! Bandi went to Jakarta for 2 weeks for business trip and thankfully we made out this morning. He promised not to be pushy about kids and wait till I’m ready and I promised not to give him mixed signal (talking about little Cahayas and stuff – yeah yeah yeah my bad.)

Anyhow… let’s switch topic to…. nano block!

Current Hobby

I’m currently loving nano blocks! I first bought one Tokyo Tower nano block from Japan for my friend as a gift. He asked me to build it for him and I became addicted!

They have other designs beside buildings.

They have other designs beside buildings.

Then I told Bandi I wanted build more and the next thing I knew, he found a toy store that carried nano blocks, and so the craziness continued…

I built them on the top of Cristiano Ronaldo fan book to cheer me up. LOL

I built them on the top of Cristiano Ronaldo fan book to cheer me up. LOL

Neuschweinstain Castle!

Neuschweinstain Castle!

Eiffel Tower!

Eiffel Tower!

I will build more this weekend! :)

If anyone of you knows where to get this in Jakarta for cheap price, let me know. I got it for $25 per box in Singapore. Please leave a comment if you know I can get cheaper in Jakarta. I know it’s much cheaper in Japan but I didn’t buy more. Hiks. :(

Current Hair Color

Since Singapore had a very long SG50 weekend I had free time to do my hair! I think I accidentally dyed the pink color permanently to my hair. I don’t know why but the pink color never fades even just a little bit! So I had an idea to add purple and blue to make it as a simple rainbow blue>>purple>>pink.

Not bad, huh?

Not bad, huh?

I even did this instagram-material-shot. LOLOL

Bought the flower headband in Japan for $3!!! a steal!

Bought the flower headband in Japan for $3!!! a steal!

For this look, I use Special effects semi-permanent dye.

The colors are Virgin Rose, Purple Smoke and Fish Bowl. See below:

You can buy them online! I did!

You can buy them online! I did!

Just take one very important note: The color won’t appear if you don’t bleach your hair.

So take the risk. :) It’s worth it.

Current Favorite Food Place

Korean fried chicken!!! Not an ordinary korean Fried Chicken, this one called Chir-Chir!

It’s located at B3 somerset 313. I heard they open at East side too but never been there.

So Bandi and I were accidentally passed this place on Friday and was surprised because there was no queue at all. Bandi told me that he read online people queued for 2 hours for this place. (Bandi uses an app called Burple, that informs him everything about food in Singapore – It’s like Bandi’s best friend now, whenever we wanted to go eating he said, “Let me ask my best friend where we should go” LOL)

Maybe because it was SG50 holiday so a lot of people were out of Singapore so Singapore was pretty empty in some places, so we went in and….

OH MY GOODNESS, Best fried chicken ever!!!! It made Chicken-Up takes like a joke, seriously!

And you know what, Bandi and I went back again on Monday to close our SG50 holiday with more fried chicken! Ahhhh! Guilty!

And that's how it's done! LOL

And that’s how it’s done! LOL

So yeah, if you happen to pass by this place, give it a try! It’s super yummy! :)

What about clean eat, you say? Well…….

*turn off laptop*


May, guilty. :p

The night I dyed my hair purple

It’s been so looonnng since the last time I blogged and I come back with a purple hair!

I'm Evil Minioooon!

I’m Evil Minioooon!

It’s a BIG DEAL for me!

I know for some people dyeing hair is not a big deal, but for me it is. I just had my 29th birthday last week and you know how many times I dyed my hair? ONCE! Yes! Even though I’m pretty vain, I didn’t play with hair a lot, which is soooo confusing for me now why because playing with hair turned out to be FUN!

3 days before my birthday, I went to salon and permed my hair. The next day it went almost flat and I was pissed. That was the second time I permed my hair and I know my hair is not the friendliest but I thought this time it would work cause the hairdresser promised that digital perm will work, and the blah and the blah.

I assumed the perm didn’t last long because they permed it to the inside while I asked them to perm it to the outside. I told them I wanted the messy sexy look, not the cute korean look, but then the hairdresser was being stubborn and sotoy.

Long story short, I felt blue because my hair didn’t work. Perming my hair was the step one of my dream hair.

Dreaming for this kind of hair.... (taken illegally from pinterest)

Dreaming for this kind of hair…. (taken illegally from pinterest)

Yes. I always wanted to have a long curly colorful hair.

Now that the perm is gone, let’s just forget about the dream hair… And then I thought to myself, I’ve always wanted a colorful hair (purple/mint/pink hair) and now I’m wondering WHY THE HELL I HAVEN’T GOTTEN ONE?

What stopped me?


If cannot have the beautiful curly purple hair, then at least have the purple hair only laaaahh. XD

So on last Friday, I chatted with my friend who is a crazy rainbow color hair lover (and did some serious colorful thingy on her hair) and talked about my plan to dye my own hair. I asked her if my plan was do-able and she said yes!

So I went to 4 different beauty supply stores to gather the things I need. Now… if you have the same plan with me, read this blog carefully.

What I want:

A purple ombre hair. The top part will be brown-ash like and the bottom part is purple with some purple highlight.

What I bought:

  1. Purple Dye (I bought the Manic panic: Electric Amethyst) – Cost $19.90
  2. Bleach: Bleach powder and the Developer (I bought the 40 vol instead of 30 vol – to make it stronger) – Cost $4.90
  3. Purple Shampoo (Optional) – Cost $25.00
  4. Gloves, mixing bowl and aluminium foil (Optional) – Cost $1.00, $1.50, $1.90 respectively)

Step by Step Guide:

First Step: Bleaching the bottom part of my hair

Because I wanted Ombre look, I only bleach half of my hair (the bottom part only). Please take note that 1 day before I just dyed my whole head with Lorea’l Nude Brown color so you can see that the top of my head is already brown, so now I only work for the purple ombre. To be honest, it was a mistake, it was just an impulse act because I felt like doing something to my hair. So now I can’t return back to the black color cause the pigment has been removed.

Anyway, moving on… this is how I bleach my hair. Bandi helped me too! Haha. If you never bleach your hair, this is how to do it: Mix the bleach powder and the solution. If you’re not sure how much just mix them all, usually the store will sell it in pair. Once mixed, never store it! Finish it or throw it.

Looks like Putri Huan Zhu, hah?

Looks like Putri Huan Zhu, hah?

I basically just divided my hair by small sections, dyed it and wrapped it with foil. Then I waited for about 45 minutes. I washed it with cold water (brrr.. I did it on around 10 pm!) and made sure all the excess bleach gone from my hair. Because I’m a bit over-paranoid with my hair, I bought the purple shampoo and washed my hair with purple shampoo. Please take note DO NOT WASH your hair if you don’t have purple shampoo cause it’s not worth it! After bleaching you hair will be dry and washing it will make it even dryer. I washed it cause I had purple shampoo. Purple shampoo helped to reduce the yellow tone of the hair so instead of yellow, it became more white. I didn’t really see it anyway. Hahaha

Then this is the MOST IMPORTANT PART OF BLEACHING: CONDITION YOUR HAIR!!! Never skip to put conditioned!

And this is how I looked like after the first bleaching (wait- first? Yes! there is a second one).

Photo 22-5-15 9 55 50 pm

As you can see there is still some brown part and the hair isn’t blonde enough to take in my purple color, so…. I decided to do the second bleaching, in the same day!!!

Second Step (Optional): Bleaching my hair again so it became even blonder

To be honest I was hoping for a platinum (white) blonde after the bleaching but I guess my natural hair is just too dark to have it on my first bleaching.

Not so blonde on the first bleach. the lighting was so dim also so you can't really see it.

Not so blonde on the first bleach. the lighting was so dim also so you can’t really see it.

Important note: Everyone’s hair has different mix of pigment so the bleaching outcome might be different. After I searched online, I knew that bleaching happened on this order:

My second bleaching ends up in yellow part. The step by step is the same like the first bleaching, only I bleach more in the tip part of my hair so it will bring an ombre feeling.

Going blonde!!! It was about 1:30 am, look at my eye bag!!!

Going blonde!!! It was about 1:30 am, look at my eye bag!!!

Yikes! The color is super ugly. Now it’s time to add some color! :D

Third Step: Dyeing the blonde part with purple color dye

Finally! The fun part!!! On the time of this step it was already 1 am, my energy was a bit drained so I think I missed some of my highlight. Manic Panic is a plant based dye. It’s technically a vegan, so you can leave it as long as you want in your head, even overnight!

So sleepppppyyy liaoooo

So sleepppppyyy liaoooo

But again, I was sooooo tired so I only left it for 1 hour. So I got a bit disappointed when I washed my hair.

Wake up the whole night, why only like this, huh?

Wake up the whole night, why only like this, huh?

The purple color was only subtle. I was too tired to dye it again so I slept…. Zzz…. It was 3 am!

Forth Step: Dyeing it purple AGAIN!

I slept at 3 am and how on earth I was fully awake at 7 am?! I usually need 12 hours of sleep on weekend! I woke up because I had an unfinished business with my hair! I even dreamt about my hair!

To defeat my disappointment, I gathered my optimism and dyed my hair purple with the rest of the manic panic tub. I finished til the last drop.

I left it for about 2.5 hours this time. I wanted to live it for longer but I had to go to my friend’s housewarming party (cum a birthday surprise for me and the other 2 may babies). So I washed it and…. TA-DAA!!!

Taa-daah! Love iiiitttt!!!

Taa-daah! Love iiiitttt!!!

It looked so much better now! The purple is more striking. Here’s from the behind:

Almost close to the dream hair lahhh

Almost close to the dream hair lahhh

So yeah…. That’s what happened on last weekend… That particular night when I dyed my hair purple. :)

I love the final result and even though the color is so messy and uneven, it gives a sexy yet fun feeling. I fell in love with my hair (sounds so vain already now, eh?!) That’s the May I know! Hahahaha!

Do you ever wonder what you look like with a non-traditional color hair? Do you want to try? If you do, what color you want to try? let me know in the comments!!! Kyaaa~ so exciting!



The Girl with the purple hair in the green boots!

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My First love died today

Dear my first love,

This is not a goodbye letter because I know you will live forever in my heart. It might sound a little pretentious but we both know it’s true.

You taught me how to love. Not just how to love-love, but how to love unconditionally, and sincerely. It was the feeling which you just want to give without asking anything back. But most importantly, you taught me how to believe in something and how to keep the faith.

You stood against all odds. You broke down and you raised back up.

I have cried for you, prayed for you and had the happiest laughter with you. You were my everything.

I took you for granted because I thought you will live forever. I thought you have all the time in the world and it didn’t matter when, I just had to keep the faith.

But then…

You don’t live forever.

You died. Today.

And the worst thing is… the solution of this problem is money. My worst enemy: money.

So I think I set you free. And believe me… you will still live forever in my heart. All the good memories I had about you will live forever.



I will hold onto memories. Because no matter how sad and heartbreaking the present time is, memories will stay true and will never change. I have indeed witnessed a dream team.

I’ve loved you and I will always love you forever, my yellow and blue.

Grazie Ragazzi. For all the memories we had together. I am forever grateful to be a part of such a wonderful team.

The memories stay forever to infinity.



Should you tell your spouse EVERYTHING?

I bet a lot of people who are newly married have this question in their mind. Because I did too. You might notice I use past tense because I have found the answer, thus I am no longer questioning.

But for those who are questioning about the answer…. let me start a (quite) long post.

Like usual, let me give a cute GIF to start the post!

Let me tell you a story first about my conversation with my mom that happened long time ago. It was when I was 15 or 16 years old and I didn’t have many relationship experiences, most of my experiences were bad, in a way that I was mostly hurt.

My mom and I were not close, however on that particular day, she decided to have a little talk about relationship and marriage. She said, “when you get married someday, keep some of your secrets for yourself. Don’t share EVERYTHING to your husband. Always keep some secret.” She even emphasized the word don’t share everything. She even said it twice.

Do you think I agreed with her?

Answer is so obvious!

If you know me well, you would know by now that I never agree with my mom about everything. LOL.

I didn’t agree with her on that very moment, but I knew I didn’t have any arguments to defend myself so I chose to shut my big mouth up.

Now that I’m married (tough luck, eh, Mom? LOL) I still disagree with her. But I don’t think she’s wrong.

I don’t think it is wrong not to share everything with your spouse.

But I know for a fact that for me it’s not gonna work. If I didn’t share everything with my spouse, my marriage would fail. That’s me.

So, let’s come back to present moment. I am happily married for 8 months now. I’ve been living together with my husband for 4 years and been together for almost 9 years now.

I do tell my husband EVERYTHING. Seriously, EVERYTHING. So to you, my good friends, when you told me “Don’t tell Bandi!” after you told your story… I never promised. If it was a very secretive thing and I did promise, there is a very small chance I didn’t tell Bandi. (But if someday Bandi asked about it, I would tell him in a heartbeat.)

The thing is…

I’m not good with secrets. Secrets tend to be tied with lies and I am a TERRIBLE LIAR. Seriously I prefer to do anything other than lying. Lying is like a snowball. Once you lie, you have to cover your lies and so on and so on. (I don’t have spare rooms in my brain for this kind of thing!)

Not enough brain cells to lie.

The biggest lie in my life is probably when I live together with Bandi. We have to cover the situation to some people and it was THE WORST! I hated it so much so in some point, I decided to just tell my parents that I lived together with Bandi. There, out of the chest.

For you, male population, who read this, you’re probably wondering how stupid I am, that I am so delusional and I might not know that my husband actually doesn’t do the same thing, which he is NOT telling me everything.

Well… Truth be told, what I’m saying is purely from my side of coin. Yes, I won’t know the fact if Bandi did the same thing to me. But dear… if you don’t trust your spouse, you might as well call a lawyer now and get divorced. Marriage won’t work without trust. This one, I’m 100% sure.

So, I trust him. I trust Bandi is also telling me EVERYTHING.

Bottom line, we tell each other everything. We always thought that healthy relationships have the same thing with us, that the couples tell each other everything, until one day… we found out that it was not the case.

I found out that very moment that the husband lied to the wife about something, even though from my personal opinion, the lie wasn’t even that important! It was a silly lie but he lied anyway and he insisted us not to tell his wife.

Eh, wait! Blackmail idea!

But then after a long conversation with Bandi, we realize that… There is not such thing as a rule of thumb for a perfect relationship. Everyone can design their own relationship and feel perfect about it.

I was so judgy I didn’t know maybe he was protecting her feelings, maybe he knew it better that his wife was better off with lies.

So, let’s go back to the question that made you guys click this blog at the first place. So…


The answer is Yes and No.

It goes back to the purpose of your marriage. This is something that you should discuss with your spouse before you actually got married. So let me put on Dr. Phil mask and do some analytic.

Yes, if you…

  • Are the type of person that value honesty and openness.
  • Are better hurt knowing the truth than not knowing at all.
  • Think it’s about the journey, not the destination.
  • Are a risk taker.

No, if you…

  • Are a goal oriented person.
  • Think ignorance is a bliss.
  • Are practical.
  • Are the type of person that value pride and privacy.
  • Are easily insecure.

So, at the end of the day, it goes back to what type of person you are and what kind of relationship you want. Both are perfectly fine. I have only one thing to underline here… if you have doubts with your spouse, ASK. Never assume. Assuming is the most stupid thing you do in marriage.

When you ask, always believe what your spouse tell you. That’s just how it works.

If you don’t trust your spouse, again, please seek professional help. Something is very wrong.

I hope this post clears any doubts because Valentine’s day is coming!!! I love Valentine’s day! It’s a one-day pass to be mushy mushy in social media! :D

>> What’s your Valentine’s day plan?! Let me know! I love sweet stories!<<


May, assisting Dr. Phil. :p

Top Ten Moments in 2014

All moments are special on its way. Sure, I can’t compare one to another as they might have different variables. So this post is for fun purposes only, ok?

I kinda got the idea from facebook, because facebook made a summary of your  life for the year 2014 and I was like… I want to create a Top Ten Moments my version!

I know it’s quite late now but I’ve been either too busy or too lazy. Haha

So here it is…

10. Getting onto a national newspaper

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It was in Media Indonesia. A reporter apparently followed my instagram and we have a mutual friend so I was interviewed about clean eating


Come on, it’s pretty awesome! :D

I was overwhelmed though because I didn’t know much about clean eating and I was scared to give wrong ideas but then I thought… What the hell? Since when I think about other people? I just wanna be in the paper! LOLOLOL.

9. Angel moved in to Singapore

The photos was taken on her work achievement celebration. :)

The photos was taken on her work achievement celebration. :)

It was one of the best surprise from Universe! Now I have my support system all around me. :)

8. watched Bandi open his Christmas present

If you haven’t watched it. Watch it! He was acting like 5 years old kid cause he was so happy. This is super worth every penny!

7. Be passionate about clean eating

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I’ve only known clean eating for ten months now… so it might be a phase, but however, I feel much happier and content now to know that I’m eating right and healthy. God knows how obsessed I am about my body, how I’m so conscious about it (I know this sounds so lame or vain or whatever-I admit this) and clean eating has changed my body so much to be more fit, more toned and of course lighter.

I’m so happy to finally learn for good that you can eat delicious food which is also healthy for you. I’m finally fine. :)

Read more about my clean eating journey here and here.

6. A Surprise birthday trip to Bali

Hubby surprised me with a trip to Bali on my birthday. That was the first time I visited Ubud and I loved it! :) The journey and the moments were unforgettable.

However, not so many photos were captured apparently.

5. Started working at Schneider

I can’t imagine how lucky I am to join one of the best company on earth. It’s been 5 months since I joined Schneider and everyday it gets better! I love my boss, my colleagues and my work. I love the fact that I can always develop and learn and excel in career. I’m excited with my work life now. (Also the reason why I blog less now-sorry :p)

One of my colleague threw a get-together party on Christmas

One of my colleague threw a get-together party on Christmas

Selfie during a forum!

Selfie during a forum!

4. Honeymoon-ing in Maldives

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Although it was postponed for about a month (because of the funeral) I guess when good thing supposed to happen, it will. :)

More photos here!

3. The Bachelorette’s Night!

And then the scavenger list is wrapped up!!! And I ended it with showing off my arms! HAHAHAHA! "I'm strong!" LOLOLOL

And then the scavenger list is wrapped up!!!

Hands down one of the best night in my life. H.A.N.D.S D.O.W.N. It was EPIC.

2. Dancing with my dad

Photo 15-1-15 3 28 50 pm Photo 15-1-15 3 30 38 pm


I can’t even– :”)

1. Married my bestfriend

Heck yeah we did!

Heck yeah we did!



of course, duh! BEST DAY EVER! Read about it here and here.

Ahhh… now I feel so nostalgic… :)

What are your top ten moments in 2014? Care to share? Probably create one post about it! It’s so fun for reminiscing! :D

I wish we knew we were in the good old times so we would cherish the time more.


May, feeling nostalgic.

Hey woman, so you STILL think you’re doing a favor, huh?

**Original Post: Hey woman, so you think you’re doing a favor, huh? (on 20 Feb 2014)**

(Please read update of this post below)

This post has been sitting too long in the draft folder. I had mixed feeling whether to post or not to post it. But then I think WTH, some people might get offended but 2014 is a year of honesty, and I don’t mean to offend anybody, I’m just being bluntly honest about my opinion.

So it all started about 2 months ago when I saw this on a social media.

men doing women favor

And then I was like…

I never once thought a man doing a favor or woman doing a favor in marriage. This is what I hate the most about how twisted marriage image is for some people!!! Why would some sex doing another sex a favor?

You know that it meanssss??

It’s time for biiiiiiiiitcccccchiiiiiiiiiin!

Ok, here it comes…

Man and woman should equally enjoy the relationship (marriage in this context) sexually, physically and psychologically. Nobody is doing anybody a favor. If a woman doesn’t want a baby, then she shouldn’t and her husband cannot make her. If a woman doesn’t want to change her last name, then it’s not like she’s going to jail if she doesn’t. NOBODY EVER ASK A WOMAN TO MARRY ANYBODY let alone acting like she is a victim or an inferior human being in a marriage.

A woman getting fat and pregnant is a favor??? So you’re ruining your body as a favor for your husband???? OH YOU HAVE A HEART OF GOLD!

When your neighbor asked you to water their plants, it was a favor. When your friend asked you to buy some hot choco in a rainy day, it was a favor. When you ran errands for your mom, it was a favor. You might not like it, but you’re doing it because you’re being a nice person.

Will you get pregnant just because you’re being nice to your husband????

And then, will you take someone’s last name (let alone married them) just because you have to do a favor?

A woman should WANT TO marry a man because she loves him regardless whether he proposed or she proposed, but never begging to ask a man to marry her (Eww!!! Begging a man to marry you is like the lowest self esteem somebody can have) so that the man and the woman want the marriage equally.

It is so funny to hear women complain how they are treated as second class human being by their husbands when they were asking to be one in the beginning. IT JUST DOESN’T MAKE SENSE.

Come on! No women should ever feel obligated, burdened or used when she decided to be a wife or a mother. Period. WOMEN… YOU ALWAYS HAVE OPTIONS NOT TO BE A WIFE OR A MOTHER. Remember you did it to yourself so NEVER COMPLAIN AS IF YOU’RE DOING ANYBODY A FAVOR. GEEZ!!!

I would love to have a baby with Bandi someday and I would love to take his last name without playing the “I do sacrifice” card. I will only do whatever makes me happy. Period.

Stop spreading sexist quote, people! Man and woman are both equally responsible of marriage and parenthood.

Sometimes I feel sexism happened because woman asked for it, because they’re putting themselves as victim in the first place. You’re a happy wife and you’re a loving mother. That’s all you need to be. If you are not, THEN BE ONE! Once you have decided to be a mother, you SHOULD NEVER complain that you are a mother! It’s like buying chocolate ice cream and crying while you’re licking it. It’s just so stupid in so many levels!

There must be something really REALLY WRONG with you when you think being a wife and a mother is a favor. SERIOUSLY.

I’m sorry if I sound rough and it wasn’t only about the picture I posted above, but it’s about all the complains I heard from my fellow friends who are wives and moms. Stop feeling sorry for yourself, stop creating dramas and playing the big sacrificial victim. you’re just making yourself look weak and sad.

Heads up! You’re a woman for god’s sake!


May – 20 Feb 2014

couldn’t help not to bitch about it. 

And I’m updating it now…. (more like a sequel)

**Hey woman, so you STILL think you’re doing a favor, huh? (on 9 Jan 2015)**

It’s almost a year from the date of the original post and let me tell you this… nothing really changed much. (Guess bitching can never change the world, huh? LOL)

The good thing is… I also don’t change my perspective about it, even after I got married. Yes! I wrote that when I was still a fiancee, when people said my life was still good. They said it’s gonna be different once I became a wife.

Guess what, baby?

It’s even better!!!

I have never ever ever put myself as a victim of marriage. That’s, my friend, is the first rule. I don’t do any favor to Bandi. Everything I’ve done for him is a pleasure for me.

Cooking for him, cleaning up his mess, buying him clothes, etc etc you name it… They are not favors. Maybe you haven’t heard, it’s called TEAMWORK.

I believe in teamwork in marriage. I cook, Bandi washes the dishes. I did laundry, Bandi ironed the clothes. I prepped the ingredients, he cooked. I picked the movie, he picked the snacks. He’s in charge of dealing with the vendors, I’m setting up giro for our banks. And the list goes on and on and on….

Many women believed (and it did happened to them) when they got married, they automatically enrolled themselves as a “wife” label, who should do all household-related. That’s why everything household related are usually called “obrolan ibu-ibu” (housewives’ conversation).

Am I offended as a feminist? No lahhh… I’m not so sensitive one… (please pronounce this in Singlish for fun)

I just feel sad that marriage is perceived unequally, as if women have more responsible, thus women usually felt “tricked” after they got married.

Here’s the thing, the ugly truth.


They victimized themselves. That’s not cool, ladies.

Let’s change our perspective. We are equally responsible, equally enjoying and equally contributing in marriage as men. Contributing doesn’t merely measured by money, it can be measured by ideas, thoughts and values.

One man + one woman + great teamwork = awesome marriage life

Make decisions together! Don’t outshine each other, remember equality! You can argue as long as you guys want, even do not stop the argument just for the sake of not fighting. Stop argue when the two finally compromise and find the meeting point. Talk and share a lot! Share things, share thoughts, share chores, share everything! He is your life partner, sharing the LIFE!

I’m growing up in 2015. I don’t bitch out that much anymore. So I’m telling you this seriously.

Remember always, he is your very best friend, your forever BFF. And as I learned from Lorraine (one of the smartest blogger I know), the foundation of friendship is equality.

Marriage is an infinite BFF relationship. So, why would you not be equal?

Ok, let me bitch out a little bit. Those women who put themselves below their husbands? THEY ARE THE WORST!!!

It’s up to my husband.,,” “I want to do this, but my husband doesn’t let me…” “He’s making the decisions, I’m just following his order.”

Graaaaaaaaaaaawwwwh!! Go live in North Korea lahhhh!

You know the saddest part is… When she was single, she was smart and all… and then she just… turned off, like totally shut down after she got married. Whyyyyy?!!!

(well, come to think of it, she’s not that smart lah, she did it to herself anyway.)

Ok ok… I quit yelling and bitching. I’ll just have to accept the fact that these things still happen and I can’t do anything about it, can I?

But if you read this and you realize I’m making a lot of sense… Please remember…

Never settle with a guy who thinks he’s higher than you (or any girls). He’s a total tool or he has problem with his masculinity.

Trust me, real men don’t get intimidated by feminists. Real man will enjoy sharing his life with a woman who embraces her freedom.

Go for those men. ;) *wink wink*


May – 9 Jan 2015

a feminist wife is a happy wife.

2015 is a perfect year for a comeback!

Happy new year everyone!!!
Like last year, and the year before… I started this new year with Bandi’s kiss and a drunken party!
The only different is the strong will to regain my abs, so I woke up and ate salad and did some pilates yesterday! Isn’t it awesome?!
This year will be a perfect year to return to clean eating and dirty training!
May this year is filled with champagne and dancing and toned muscles and laughter and more and more adventures!
Have a great one, people!

May, feeling energized!