My Treasure

A couple days ago I was tidying up my room before redecorating and then I found a shoebox of…

love letters 2

Love cards and love letters!

Love Letters!

Doesn’t it seem vintage romantic? Teehee!

It’s been two years since our Long Distance Relationship ended so I forgot how these used to be my treasures, that re-reading them hundred of times still would make me smile like the first glance.

I’ve always thought that rereading these cards and letters would only bring out painful memories from our long distance era, since the writings were mostly full of encouragement and “I miss you” words. I reminisce the blue feeling, the hazy situation and the cloudy hopeless mind full of question mark because on that moment Bandi was quite sure that he was gonna settle down in US while I was nowhere near going there.

Somehow, there were some cards that gave me smiles. Like I said, I was so frustrated by the distance and the “don’t know when to meet you again” feeling, yet we could still write nice things like this.

Bandi's sweet sweet words for encouraging me.

Bandi’s sweet sweet words for encouraging me.

And some sane times, I reply him with encouragement too. Though it was very rarely happened.

And some sane times, I reply him with encouragement too. Though it was very rarely happened.=p

Bandi was studying when I opened this treasure and he groaned, “Oh no… Why are you doing this when I study?!” Then he was slowly pushing his books away and joining me to read the letters one by one with some comments like, “Oh my god, we were so cheesy!” or “Geez, I was writing this on 5th month LDR? Still long way to go, May! NO WAYYY! Break up with him!” or “Aww, you remember this?”

And here goes my personal favorite of all time:

It was so touchy I accused him whether he copied from Google! Haha!

It was so touchy I accused him whether he copied from Google! Haha!

With a kiss or two (ah, who am I kidding, a lot) we started to get cozy and time slipped away and it was suddenly two hours of reading. It was a very nice moment to share with him so I thought we should do this more often, the problem is, if we were doing it often, it won’t feel so magical because yeah, it’s memories. They tend to be forgotten and then found to be a treasure, right?

So Bandi said, “do you want to put it in a time capsule? When we grow old and all our kids have gone out and we have traveled the world, we would just sit at home and read this again.”

I was tempted to do it actually. But in one condition, I want to show this to our kids first. You know, seeing their disgusted faces of “Eww, Dad*! You’re so cheesy!” would be so awesome!!! I cannot wait!

*)terms and conditions are implied because Bandi doesn’t want to be called Dad. But hey, if you’re reading this, I’m the owner of the womb. So “Dad” or nothing! Haha!

Then we talked about our imaginary kids and I freaked out again. Are we going to be good parents if we ever be one someday? Lately I’ve been reading Arman’s Blog and he’s so damn lucky to have those two gorgeous kids. I know that it would depend on your parenting style et cetera et cetera, but wouldn’t the character of the kid be a factor to? Geez, here I am blabbering about kids. Kinda freaky, huh?

Never mind then, I still have some time to think about it though, at least five years. LOL Bandi is so going to kill me.

Anyway, talking about the treasure, I’ve found another treasure that was being put in the same box with the love letters. It’s our scrapbook. When Bandi went to US, I gave him a scrapbook with about 200 pages that I went to bind myself and colored the cover myself. Unfortunately I only used about the first 30 pages, so during his time there, he wrote a couple of things and it was like adding 5 more pages. So we have so many pages left on the book so when we were going for the ultimate trip during his summer break, I put all the memories captured on the book. =)

Here’s some of my favorite pages:

Scrapbook collage

That book is my treasure too and would probably go into my Time capsule too. And guess what was the comment for reading this book. You got it right if you thought, “Shit! I was so damn skinny!!!” Hahaha!

I want to re-write my favorite page of the book. It was written for Bandi to read on the airplane back to Texas after our summer holiday. If this sounds cheesy for you, please please please don’t unfollow my blog. LOL. But seriously I think it’s sweet. (I am so self centered, I want the world to know I’m romantic that way.)

So don’t worry, chase your dream! Even your dream is in the other side of the globe, and 12 hours away from me, I will still support you. I know I said mean things like I can’t keep waiting for you or whatever, but you know how I feel about you. That feeling is too strong to let go, so I decided to never let go, and keep holding on. =)

You flew 12,000 miles to see me, you kept your promise. So I’ll keep mine, that I will always love you no matter how long I should wait or how far I should go.

I love us. And us is what’s gonna make me stay strong. =) I love our silly moments, I love our lazy days, our adventures, our stubbornness. I love how we argue and how we always make up. I love the times we made sushi, watched Ipin-Upin, we talked about life and everything. I love how we always say thank you to each other, how we always be honest and faithful, how we always mock and praise, how we kiss and how we hold hand. I love us.

It will always be this way. You and me. Forever.

Love, May.

So, what about your treasure?

P.S. Was thinking to make kinda Give Away about this theme, but then since the only people who react to this blog is Colson, he would be the one who win it so then I had to send the parcel to Netherlands.  Hahaha. Just kidding, sir! =)

But seriously, what’s your treasure? I would love to hear stories!!!

Cheers,

May, in a nostalgic mood.

Look Closer to Apple Pie and Cinnamon

Nope this is not a culinary post or a recipe blog. Sorry to disappoint hungry people though.

This post is about a  story of a girl. Let’s call her Apple Pie. Apple Pie has been in a long term relationship with her boyfriend, whom would we call Cinnamon, since they met in college, here in Singapore about 5 or 6 years ago. They’ve been together ever since. Apple Pie then had everything she wanted. A good settled life in Singapore, with so many great friends around, a good career, even an offer to be a public teacher (which is sooo amazing in Singapore), but she turned down the offer, and she must quit her job that she liked and she would sadly leave all of her friends and she must leave Singapore.

Why?

She did them all in the name of love.

Because her boyfriend (was then in a long distance relationship with her) proposed to her. Then she must follow her boyfriend (then became future husband) to where he lived, which is a city that if compared to Singapore is much less developed. And the most horrifying thing was, she didn’t know anyone in that city. She must restart her life. She leave everything she has just because of a guy.

In this paragraph, you probably would think “This girl is so stupid.”

I would too…

That, until I knew what her reason is, and that this is not “just a guy”.

I was in the same condition with her when Bandi was talking about going back to his hometown and I straight away told him “No way, we’re breaking up.” So I was blown awayyy with how universe works. Universe arranged my encounter with this girl and we talked and talked and talked until midnight and she opened my eyes of how idiotic love can be. And love should be that way. I requested Bandi to be idiotic, while I stayed sane. That wasn’t fair.

Now let me tell you the other side of the story of Apple Pie and Cinnamon, and let’s take a closer look.

Apple Pie and Cinnamon had the amazing two years relationship when they were in college. Spent so much time together and later found out that they were made for each other. Apple Pie learned a lot from Cinnamon, especially of how Cinnamon treated his family. He was the family guy every girls dying to have to be their husband. Cinnamon was not like that at all, then she learnt how to call her mom and asked her how she is and stuffs. That was one of so many things Apple Pie learnt from Cinnamon.

Long story short, after graduated, Cinnamon moved back to his hometown, a city in the other part of Indonesia, far from Capital city Jakarta, and not Apple Pie’s hometown either. Cinnamon had to move back because he had to inherit his father’s local business. His father was getting old and that was something he must do. Apple Pie tried to understand that but she still stayed in Singapore, for another 2 or 3 years and for that period of time, they were in a long distance relationship.

I know Apple Pie loves living here and it must be so hard for them to decide what to do for their future. They must decide something or otherwise they would be in an LDR for the rest of their lives! (And trust me that’s not a wise idea!) So I met Apple Pie, about 3 months ago. She told me she would go back to Indonesia for good. I asked her why and she said because I wanted to be with Cinnamon.

I asked why again, and she explained.

In the first two years of relationship, when they were still in college, it was all about her. She was the center of the universe. Cinnamon did everything for her. Because it was only the two of them. There were no parents or family involved. Apple Pie knows that Cinnamon would do anything for her. If he could, he would stay with Apple Pie in Singapore, and continue to treat Apple Pie as the center of the universe.

But Cinnamon has a family and he must take care of them and that is something that a man must do. And this is the time for Apple Pie to pay back the favor. Now she wants him to be the center of the universe. She would do anything to make him happy. And she knows he’s happy when he’s with her and his family. So she would move in with him, to an unfamiliar town, which language she couldn’t talk.

I, before knowing her personally, would never ever ever understand why a woman would make a sacrifice for a man like that. That is so degrading for a feminist like me. I would probably call her names like dumbo or stupido or anything.

But then I knew her, and she was not at all stupid or delusional or weak. She was just in love. And she proved me that love does conquer all, my friend.

I am so touched with her bravery and her big heart. It surely wasn’t an easy thing to do, but remember this:

“Sometimes the right thing and the hard thing are the same thing.” (Liz Lemon – 30 Rock)

I’m sorry I didn’t know her sooner. But I’m glad in that short period of time, I met her and got to know her better. We could’ve been BFF if she didn’t move out, but however I’m grateful that I met her.

She made me reflect about my relationship with Bandi which is more or less in the same situation. Bandi is just as worth to sacrifice as Cinnamon and there’s nothing I should hesitate that he will take care of me like he takes care of his sisters and his mother. He’s a family guy that every girls dying to have to be their husband.

But, my heart is not as big as Apple Pie. I am selfish and for these 6 six years of our relationship, not even once I put Bandi as the center of the universe. It’s been always me, me, and me. I have to be the center of his universe, now and always. I have to be spoiled in every possible way. And I don’t feel bad, because I love that.

God knows how much I love Bandi.

I told Apple Pie that. And she said, people speak different love languages, like in Gray Chapman’s book. And I shouldn’t feel guilty. Everyone express love in different way, different language. (You can find more about this in Gary Chapman’s 5 Love Languages).

Universe works in a strange way. I met Apple Pie in a cycling event, got to know her over a Pasta cooking session and talked to her til passed midnight, and finally realized how love conquers all over a short coffee in Cafe Cartel. Yet this lady made a difference in my life.

The wholemeal spaghetti that we cooked.

I hope I can deliver the message of love and sacrifices in this post. I hope there are no more stupid judgments over the things people do in the name of love. I used to be that person and now I’m not anymore. Love is the most important thing in life. Everything is worth sacrificing for love.

Hey there, Apple Pie. Thanks for inspiring me, and changing my perspective about love and sacrifices. Have fun on your next adventure with Cinnamon. And see you on your wedding day! So excited!!!

Cinnamon’s niece drew this for their wedding day.

Love,

May.

P.S. All photos are taken from Apple Pie’s instagram.

P.P.S. I use fake names just for fun purposes. :p

P.P.P.S Update: Apple Pie’s reaction of this post!

Another Long Distance’s Damage

Yesterday when I read my Whastapp message, I couldn’t believe my eyes.

“It’s done, May.”

So, my bestfriend since primary school who has been in a relationship with this girl for 9 years gave me the flash news. They broke up, after a fucking 9 years relationship!!

They were high school sweethearts, survived through college challenge, managed through different working lives, but broke up because of… *drumroll please* Long Distance RelationSHIT!

He didn’t really mention that it’s because of the distance, but from his story, distance really did quite of damage on their relationship. Lack of communication, gilrfriend’s grumpy all the time (I told him I was too when I was in LDR, so this is normal) and finally they just grew up apart. (This part, I sincerely understand.)

People changed, people grew apart. They had the same reason with Bandi and I on this post.

After hours of trying to convince him to fight back for the broken relationship, I finally gave up and tried to be a supportive friend. Try to accept the fact that people do make up and break up. It’s part of the universe’s drama.

I was sad yesterday. The news affected my mood. It’s like having my parents divorced (even my parents didn’t love each other, at least my friends did.)

Later that night, I had a chat with my housemate and she told another story about her friends who has been together since high school, and only survived marriage not even one year.

So it’s true what people said that Long Term Relationship doesn’t guarantee the depth of the relationship. Well I still think however longer relationship gives you more time to know each other because all of the short term relationship that led to marriage always fell apart (in my point of view), but again, no guarantee of whatsoever.

Now I can’t imagine how do you move on from someone who had been spending days with you for the last nine years? Is that even possible?

Anyone has this experience?

In grieve,

May.

A Blast from the Past: Long Distance Relationship Ideas.

Just when I thought I will never make any more post about LDR, here I am, reminiscing my own memories with my LDR and my tricks during the whole shits, hopefully can help any of you who are in the Long Distance Relationshit. So, after those hundreds of whining LDR posts (Ok, I’m exaggerating) here goes the last one (finally, hopefully).

I was in LDR for 2 years 1 month, between Texas and Bandung-Jakarta-Singapore. However, unlike some of you, I can’t just do impulse things like maxing out my credit cards by buying tickets and visit each other, because even though I did buy tickets, I couldn’t enter without visa. So, all I could do was just accept the fact that I’m in a fucking LDR. And in order to make it work, we did couple of fun things together online and here are some of my LDR Ideas that hopefully can help you all.

  1. Pizza Night

Pick up your favorite pizza parlor, order while Skype online, so you can see each other. After you order, bet whose pizza will arrive first. Maybe you could bet for whoever lost, must strip. LOL

So anyway, after the pizzas arrive, you can have a pizza time just like normal couple, expect the fact that your other half is inside the fucking monitor. But hey, you still have the conversation, the pizza and the soda. So why complain? ;)

  1. Play chess online

Bandi and I did this all the time. You can google online chess game or just play it through yahoo messenger’s game tools. It might be a little personal for me because Bandi and I like to play chess and mock each other everytime we do wrong steps and one will beg the other one to undo the step. For a while I could fee like we were actually playing together.

  1. Watch movie together

This one is also my personal favorite because god knows how much we love watching movie together and comment a lot during the movie. We loved snuggling while watching DVDs, so because we were in the LDR, so I would just snuggle with pillows, with him online through phone. I used headset during the whole movie.

Both of you must download the chosen movie the night before, preferably from the same website/torrent, and then click play in the same time. Therefore, both of you will watch technically together, the exactly same movie.

This might a little costly since you must use phone call the whole movie, but since you’re in the LDR, I believe you reserve quite amount of money for this phone bill crap.

So, enjoy the movie and happy commenting!

  1. Messenger doodle

Do you know Yahoo Messenger have this doodle tools? It’s so fun to do. You could draw together, playing hangman, writing “I love you” and so on. You could also take out the girl and boy creature and kiss or hug each other. You could say, “That’s me, kissing you, in a parallel universe. =)

  1. Karaoke Night

Another favorite!!! Download a ‘music only’ song from youtube or any other website, connect Skype and play the song on the Windows Media Player or something. Then sing together like you’re in the karaoke!

Anyway this activity needs a headset to be plugged into your CPU. Our favorite online karaoke song was “Don’t wanna miss a thing” by Aerosmith. =)

  1. The “What would I do” game.

I can’t guarantee a suicidal feeling during this game, you know, because since you can only touch the monitor. So, this game is basically just telling each other and making the list of “What would I do once you’re here”. You can start with simple things as “kiss your eyes” or “take you to the beach” and it would just go on and on and on until you two start to be depressed. Well, don’t tell you I didn’t warn you. But however this game also made quite positive impact for my LDR. After we play this game, I always this “looking forward” feeling for everything in the list to be finally happened. It’s probably a good motivation for you not to give up.

  1. Letters and Cards

Not email and ecard, but real mail and real card! I looove writing letters to Bandi. It felt Jane Austen-like and it was so romantic! I would spray my perfume on the letter so he could have my smell for some times. The feeling of receiving letters and cards were as amazing as writing them. I love the feeling that the card I’m holding was actually touched by Bandi! Oh that’s how much I miss him!

I think it’s one of the MUST MUST do during LDR, because sending letters and cards take much more effort than email and ecard. Believe it or not, during the whole LDR, Bandi never even once, sent me ecard. He’s just as classic romantic as me. We love real cards. =)

  1. Le Sexy Time

Well, I hope you all who’s doing the LDR is at least 18, because hey, before 18 is waaaaay too young for a committed relationship, especially if it’s LDR!! No way! What? What did you think I will say?

So anyway, Sexy time during LDR is both tricky and lucky. Tricky because well, you know how sad it is not being kissed an touched by the person you love when that person is just right in front of you, but separated by that fucking monitor fake glass. Lucky because it’s impossible to do more sin and harm. LOL

Le Sexy time won’t be as intense as normal relationship, because most of the time you do via Skype is talking and flashing boobs. And when it’s the guy’s time to flash boobs, it’s just unfair!

I won’t teach you creative idea for Le Sexy time in my blog (trust me I have a lot LOL), because I have minor readers (really?) but from my point of view, it’s very necessary in an LDR.

Don’t ever think by being in an LDR, your relationship is paused. It’s still progressing just like any other normal relationship, so don’t stop or decrease the thoughts of spending time together. You guys will spend time together just like usual, you guys will have dates just like usual. The difference is just you two are not in the same place geographically. My case with Bandi was even shittier because we have a huge time difference. Every night I will call him to wake him up. Sometimes it’s even dawn at his hour, if I was too tired for a late night chat. However, keep spending time together even though it’s just 5 minutes!!

Keep arranging dates, game nights, movie nights, etc, just like normal couple do. Don’t put your life on hold just because you’re in an LDR. Don’t keep the grudges during LDR and thought you will pour out later. Trust me; there will no later for that case. Just pour out via skype, honey.

And one last very important tagline from my LDR:

Keep the faith, avoid the drama.

Alright so that’s a warp. This post is probably the last post about LDR I will ever make. (Knock on wood I don’t want any more LDR) My LDR was hard and it sucks big BIG time. But it’s not impossible. Remember this glorious feeling you’ll have once you got through it. However LDR is still the biggest tag in my blog and I met a lot of friendly blogger during that LDR blogging times. ;)

So, Have a fun LDR (oh come on, who am I kidding?!)

Have a passable LDR!

I hate LDR so don’t come for me asking for advice!! LOL just kidding.

Love,

May

There’s nothing wrong with falling torn apart.

It’s been four months since I last blogged something. And now I’m back with a flash news. I quit the Long Distance Relationship.

I can’t say much about it. I was thinking about what I would say in my blog when this relationship ended, but here I am, forgetting every little word I prepared.

This is NOT a broken hearted post.

There’s nothing wrong with being in love head over heels and then you’re falling torn apart. That’s what makes you human.

I just want to highlight two things:

One, it is not because of the distance. Because if it was, we would’ve broken up two years ago.

Two, he will always be the best thing that’s ever happened to me. Nothing will ever change that.

We stop hanging on not because we’re afraid, not because we’re tired, nor we stop falling in love. We stop because we simply want different things in life. People change, so do we. We don’t perceive things like we did four years ago, or even one week ago. We change our dreams, we want different things, and we grow apart.

This is not easy. For sure.

But it’s been a while, and I’m still breathing, the sky is blue, he is still as awesome as he was, (:p) and the sky is still blue. So, there’s nothing Armageddon about it.

Sometimes, the right thing and the hard thing are the same thing. -Liz Lemon, 30 Rock

If someday, one year later, or even ten years later, we meet again, and we still have that tiny little faith in our heart, then it would be a different story.

 

But now, here we are, saying goodbye, walking to two opposite paths. This is the end of our story, right now, in this present time. And I couldn’t ask for a better romance to tell to my grandchildren. I’m so glad I was doing all this romance with him. I’m so blessed that I could feel that amazing feeling with him.

 

So, you… This is your goodbye blog.

Be strong always. You’re the most amazing man I’ve ever met in my life.

 

May

100 Reasons to keep loving you

So we’re in a long distance relationship, so the romance gets out of sight, so it’s boring just with the messenger and skype, so what?

Today is a very special day and I’ll tell you why keep loving you is very easy…

  1. You let me switch the porridges, when I bought the bad one and you bought the yummy one.
  2. You let me name your motorcycle.
  3. You always give me the last bite.
  4. You got me a glass of water when I coughed.
  5. And you took a tissue when I sneezed.
  6. You were there when I was sick; never let me out of your sight, even though my mom was also there.
  7. You bought me my favorite book.
  8. You bought me a dog; even though you didn’t like dogs.
  9. And you took care of my dog, and you call her our dog.
  10. You let me trim your eyebrows.
  11. You remembered the shirt I wore on our first date; it doesn’t fit me anymore though.
  12. You always bring me strawberry milks.
  13. You are never not saying “I love you” in one day.
  14. You came to my place at dawn when I said I miss you.
  15. You wrote me a letter, a nice one.
  16. You always washed your feet before came to my room.
  17. You accept the fact that I have OCD.
  18. You printed my thesis first, before yours.
  19. You always picked me up at work.
  20. You brushed your bathroom tiles when you knew I was coming.
  21. You gave me a nickname, a sweet one.
  22. You printed me a personal T-Shirt.
  23. You always say good night before I sleep
  24. .And you say good morning when I wake up.
  25. You always kiss me when we meet.
  26. You never forget to hold my hand while we walk.
  27. You sent me magazines when I said I was bored.
  28. You let me switch the TV.
  29. You let me pick the movie.
  30. You kept all the things I gave you, even it’s only a post-it.
  31. You read a Mars and Venus book I gave you, and remembered it for almost 2 weeks.
  32. You made everything hard to be easier.
  33. You are a fun person to be with.
  34. You are a good kisser.
  35. Your bum is so sexy.
  36. You’re so hot when you’re sweaty.
  37. You’re smart. You really are.
  38. You really nail the map.
  39. You don’t like other girls but me.
  40. You eat a lot.
  41. You’re counting stuffs without calculator.
  42. You have an irritating voice, and we matched in the karaoke room.
  43. You taught me to play pool.
  44. And you taught me to swim in the pool. So it’s two pools then.
  45. You have very nice teeth.
  46. You always laugh at my jokes.
  47. You always say I’m cute, even when my face is oily and I have a bad-haired day.
  48. You remember my PMS period.
  49. You know exactly where my moles are.
  50. You didn’t notice when I gained weight.
  51. But you noticed when I lost weight.
  52. You love my dishes and you cooked for me too.
  53. You wash the dirty dishes with me.
  54. You complete my sentences… correctly.
  55. You are my truly best friend.
  56. You made me eat the spinach.
  57. You made me do things I thought I won’t… like bungee jumping.
  58. After we bungee jumped, you said, “See? there’s nothing to be afraid of as long as you’re with me”
  59. You watched me sleeping.
  60. You read every post in my blog.
  61. You never let me go out at night without a jacket.
  62. You bought me cajuput oil, coz it makes my tummy warm.
  63. You brought me souvenir from every cities you’ve visited, I knew you were thinking of me all along.
  64. You bought me 3 different rings until I said “I like it.”
  65. When I lost that ring I really liked, you bought me another one.
  66. You booked Eiffel Tower for next 3 years.
  67. You made my birth date as your ATM pin number.
  68. You love to dance with me.
  69. You learned chess for me, so we can play it together.
  70. You count the exact amount of the distance between our cities, and the number is amazing: 10276 miles (1:02 am, 7th of June, it’s the day when we got together).
  71. You made me a mixed CD, and I love it.
  72. You never ask me to choose between you and my dream. (and now my dream is to be with you)
  73. You bought me a book about going around the world and wrote it inside, “Let’s!”
  74. Even you were having a seasick; you asked me whether I’m okay with the high tides.
  75. You bought me a cupcake a year after I asked you one. (and you still remember you promised me)
  76. You watched Glee, even you don’t like musical drama, just to have a conversation with me.
  77. You let me name our future children.
  78. You asked me what kind of dogs I want in our future house.
  79. You always put me on your imaginary future.
  80. You made me eggnog.
  81. You let me use your paypal account.
  82. And you weren’t mad at me when I overused it.
  83. You like to say nice things about me. Those really make my days.
  84. You miss me every single day. I just know it.
  85. You brought me to the zoo and accompany me all day to explore it, even I knew you were bored with zoo.
  86. You flew a thousand miles for celebrating my birthday. That’s the sweetest thing everyone had ever done to me.
  87. You always always always support my dream, even though it seems impossible.
  88. And when it became clearer, you told me, “See, I knew you can do it.”
  89. You always trust my guts, even when I don’t trust myself.
  90. You always say “Mmm, comfort!” everytime you hug me.
  91. You like my hair, you said it smells good.
  92. Your internet cookies automatically lead to my name when you type ‘twitter’.
  93. You kissed me on the sea.
  94. You believe in god, though I don’t, you’re okay with it.
  95. You said your god is nice and he will look out for me too.
  96. You never change, you always love me.
  97. You made a facebook account just so I could put “in a relationship with… YOU”
  98. You still treat me as sweet as on our first date years ago.
  99. You are one gorgeous god’s creation, I bet he really put some serious thought when making you for me, since he knows I want a lot of things.
  100. You love me, unconditionally. Enough said.

Still wondering why I said I’m very lucky? :p

god's gorgeous creation

Have a very happy birthday cupcakes. I’m sorry I can’t fly there. But you know I’ll always love you no matter what.

Love, May.

Long Distance Relationship: Season 2

So yesterday he flew away one more time. I went to the airport to send him away. The atmosphere is more or less the same with what we had almost two years ago. He hasn’t arrived at Houston when I’m writing this so I still don’t know of what will happen on our next Long Distance Relationship. All I know is: I’M ON IT BABY! *positive atmosphere here*

We had the most amazing times on this summer holiday. We traveled a lot, visited new places, talked about so many stuffs about us, and decided something. Yes, we decided something big, probably the biggest thing will ever happen to me. And calm down, people, it’s not a wedding. :p I can’t tell you what it is now, but maybe two months from now I will. ;)

Two days before he was going back to Houston, he said something really moved me,

“You keep making me falling in love… again and again…”

I knew, that moment for sure, that he actually didn’t want to leave. He never wanted to leave me at the first place. It’s just something that he has to do. And I felt like a bitch for always blaming him to leave.

I told him I’d wait, this time sincerely and with smile upon my face. I don’t know for how long do I have to keep running, but if I had to keep running in this relationship, then so be it. It’d be worth every sweat.

So, here I am, on the Long Distance Relationship: Season 2, which I though I would NEVER ever want another season to continue! Bluurrgh!

You are welcome to  share with me the episodes of joy and tears on this season. :)

God I hope this is season finale!!!

may

The things We would do when we’re in the same timezone

*)Well, the 3 months summer holiday is over, and I’ve crossed some of the things I mentioned on the post.

Yeah! The suffer of  my Long Distance Relationship is nearly finished!

I’m gonna touch my finish line in 9 days.

And for one and a half years, Bandi and me have been writing of the things we would like to do when we’re finally in the same timezone again.

And today, I would like to post it in public. Just for fun, and show off of how romantic I am. :p

  • Going to the zoo
  • Watching 500days of Summer, Harry Potter and the half blood prince
  • Cooking Pasta Carbonara –> I don’t know how come we didn’t do that? duh!
  • Making home-made Sushi
  • Spend weekend in Bandung, visit Maxis
  • Eat at Eastern
  • Definitely going to movie theatre, in Ciwalk!
  • Visit Clarke Quay at night
  • Bungee Jumping
  • Eat Blueberry cheesecake at Cizz
  • Playing chess –> He actually bought the chess board already, but somehow we didn’t do that. :p
  • Reading my old diaries
  • Dancing :)
  • Dancing on the beach. :) –> oopsie, too excited on the beach.
  • watching sunset
  • Snorkeling!
  • Swimming in the ocean
  • Kissing in the ocean
  • Snuggling all day
  • Chatting at Starbucks all day
  • Road trip to Bandung by motorcycle –> maybe we’re too old to do this. ;p
  • Cook couple of Indomies in a big bowl and eat it together –> forgot!
  • Watching concert.

And maybe the list is still growing. And if you have fun idea to do, feel free to comment. We would gladly do it!!! =D

With love, May.

Ten things I (and You’ll) hate about LDR

This post is written for people who are about to have a Long Distance Relationship (LDR). It is a MUST to read this post if you’re about to have an LDR. if it’s your friend that’s gonna do the LDR, tell him/her to read this post.
REALLY. It’s important.
While other people told you “It’s ok, you guys are gonna thru it!” I’d just simply said, “DON’T DO IT!”

Why? now, here are the reasons why I (and you’ll) hate LDR:
(p.s I wrote the 3rd person with he/him, but it also works for a she)

  1. You’ll miss each other’s birthdays. Don’t forget to mention holidays such as Christmas, New Year and Valentine’s.
  2. Long distance phone call sucks! the voice is not clear, it’s always dropped and you almost have to shout when you talk. And you pay quite a money for that.
  3. When you’re down, he is literally not there. And “what’s important is that he’s in your heart” is totally bullshit! Coz when you’re down, you need someone’s body to hug you, to comfort you. 3 Dimensions!
  4. Hugging from emoticon messenger sucks! It was cute in the beginning, but getting really annoying. This is for exmple: I need you to hug me. Here is a hug for you honey… >:D<. Cih! it’s pathetic.
  5. Sending stuffs for a gift across the ocean is expensive. The gift itself will be way cheaper than the handling fee. So you’re gonna put the gift for birthday, valentine’s and anniversary in the corner of the shelf and waiting for him to come back.
  6. When he said, “Yes, I totally understand.” he lied. He couldn’t actually understand your situation because you’re in different atmospheres, and he couldn’t feel it. Think about it, being understand in a normal relationship is hard enough. Guess in LDR?!
  7. Yes, you feel lonely when you’re sad. But guess what, you feel even lonelier when you’re happy. Because the first person you want to share your happiness with is not there.
  8. There will be the time when you finally realize that you CAN actually live without him. And that feels sooo wrong.
  9. No dates. Describe your perfect date. Is it dancing under the moonlight, having romantic dinner at your favorite restaurant, or watching stack of DVDs with Pringles and his arms around you. The feeling of being taken out on a date is wonderful. And you’re not gonna have it for at least… err, one year? or more?
  10. You stop making real memories with him. The only memories you’re gonna have is talking on the phone, chatting thru messenger, waving each other in front of webcam. That’s all. No more “do you remember the Italian restaurant that we tried on our 2nd anniversary?” or, “do you remember when we went out without our undies?”

So, my point is…
It’s simply becoz we are far.
We are actually far.

So, is it the distance that breaks us apart? Yes. Sad, but true.

We’re in the different hemosphere. I’m looking at the sun, you’re looking at the moon.
One of us needs to stay up late to have a date. And it’s even a cyber date!
You’re just looking to a piece of electronic called monitor, which doesn’t have arms so it can’t hug you, and doesn’t have body temperature so it’s not warm like u.
It’s even better u’re going to the moon so the time could be more flexible.
If I was dying, u need at least 32 hours to get here, and I’m dead already.

It’s been over a year. Nothing is better. And nothing is adaptable. It still sucks the way it sucked a year ago.

And the saddest is this…

There will be the time when you realize that you can live without him and you’re okay with your life.
And that feels so wrong…and sad.

So, when I told everyone who asked for pre-LDR advice “don’t do it”, I wasn’t joking. I humbly said there’s nothing good come out of it.
I had to tell you the ugly truth.
So, if you don’t love the guy, or the girl that much, DON’T DO IT. It’s like suicidal.

But if you’ve read this post and still wanted to do the LDR, well… You must have loved him/her so much. :)

So, May… if you hate it so much, why are you in one?
“Hmm… I love him that much.”

-May-

Another shit in a rock bottom in a Movie Theatre

Today, coming another hard thing for facing the truth of being apart from my baby. After three months, I finally sit again on our favorite movie theatre’s seat watching Fast and Furious 4, which he had seen few days before and he told me to see it too.
I’m not exaggerating it. It was really hard to go to the movie theatre after he left.
For those who don’t know, we’re kind of couple whom scored as “have no life-couple” on some website’s game for seeing too many movies together instead of having our social lives. We’ve spent almost every weekends on movie theatre, sometimes two nights in a row, sometimes two movies in one day. He even took me watching “Yes Man” five hours before he went to his plane to Houston. Yes, we love movies just too much.
And yes, it was really hard to go there without him.
I thought this is gonna be one of those moments of  “well, it’s not actually that hard” thingy. But I’m wrong. This one, was actually hard. I can say this may be the hardest moment of facing the truth that you may go to some places alone, not with him anymore. And movie theatre is freakishly weird without him.
This is the first time watching movie without somebody chattering about the names of the actors, or some flash back from the prequel. The first time without sounds of chewing French fries or potato chips. I miss him to the details. I really do.
Well… guess I’ll hit another rock bottom when I eat blueberry cheesecake without him. *sigh*
But hey… Sanguine doesn’t whine a lot, and better let go off this drama. So, I tried to enjoy Paul Walker. :D And I actually did.
There will be more shitty things to come on this Long Distance Relationship, but still… I have my baby to keep me insane and stay me away from the drama queen. :D
And I have this blog to whine to. :p