Post is an idea from Lia, a nice and kind mom-to-be!
How do you value a person you just met? Did you judge them the moment you shook your hand with them? Or the moment they made their first comment?
Some people judge someone from their handshakes, others from the way they dress or the brands attached on their shoes/bags, while others judge someone from their eye contacts or from their dialects, etc, etc…
From their appearances
I don’t judge people from their appearances, but I have built a wall with people who wears high heel with full made-up face to a theme park, and to those who don’t eat food from hawker center. I have a tendency to not be friends with high maintenance girls. I don’t judge them, it’s their choice of life, but I just can’t handle them.
Thankfully I don’t have one. But whenever Bandi’s friends introduce some girlfriends (btw the girlfriends from Bandi’s friends changed from time to time and now I’m at a point where I don’t remember the names anymore) I indirectly judge whether i could hit it off with them based on what they wear. There is high percentage of a chance to get along when she doesn’t wear stilettos and Prada bag. So… Am I judgmental? You tell me.
Wait, wait… do I have a friend who owns branded bags? OF COURSE, DUH! And I still befriend them. I’m just saying that usually I don’t spend time getting to know a stranger who’s more likely doesn’t have anything in common with me. But if I had to spend time with a mutual friends who wore designer bag, I would still try make the conversation. Get it?
I don’t judge but I presume my opinion thus I don’t want to waste my time.
But let’s say, I met a girl who wore prada bag and chanel stiletto (if there’s such thing) that is also a feminist, active in animal welfare, carefree, able to eat one pan of pizza and fun to be with; I would so gonna get to know her better and be her friend. But seriously, slim chance, my friend…
Let’s just say I’m an opinionated bitch for that department. Sorry. Maybe someday I’ll get my karma for this.
What I’m trying to say is… everyone tends to group up with people who are likely similar to them, and that’s normal. :)
It’s impossible not to judge someone, but it is always nice to be surprised about how wrong we could be sometimes. :) I would love to be wrong sometimes. I still do believe in the fact that there are good in everyone.
From the first conversation
Most of the times, I judge someone from our first conversation. When they talked about how insecure they were or how unhappy they were, or how they kept complaining about stuffs, I would definitely wish not to ever encounter that person again. I just hate hate hate hate HAAAAATE to be around pessimists.
Second, I hate girls who had to be validated by men; i.e. girls who kept complaining why they were still single, and so desperate for someone to marry them. GO F YOURSELF.
Third, I hate girls who acted weak. OMAGAHHH those are the worst species!!!
Fourth, I had never given (and will never give) any second chance getting to know a man who said misogynistic comments, such as “women are destined to stay in the kitchen” or “I’ll just find me a wife when I’m rich cause any women would want to date me when I’m rich.” GO SHOVE A GUN ON YOUR ASS. Oh, and pull the trigger please.
I so judge someone from the first conversation. What if I was wrong? Well, let’s just say it was my loss then.
Would you judge someone who…?
Ok, now let me give you some what-ifs and please answer them on the comments. I don’t have giveaway for this, but I hope you spend time answering this.
1. What crossed your mind when you met a girl who wore tank top with an un-shaved armpits?
2. What crossed your mind when you met your friend’s new boyfriend who picked your friend up without stepping out from his car? He kept honking at your friend and shouted “let’s go!”
Well, it’s not that I asked you to judge people, let’s just state opinions. Do give me your honest opinion about what crossed your mind at the first time.
May, the not-so-proud opinionated beyatch.